Had a pretty sobering experience today..

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by YTBFC, Oct 25, 2016.

  1. YTB

    YTBFC Guest

    Went along to Bluebell Wood Children's Hospice. Me being naive, I didn't take in the 'hospice' part and assumed it was some kind of children's home or respite care for kids or summat. Being a lad who spent time in the care system I was interested to see what was offered etc. However, upon reaching the place (it's in Anston) I asked my colleague if this was actually a place for kids who were ill. It gave off that vibe as we approached it in the car, dunno how/why. He confirmed it was, probably thinking I was a wally (I am) for not already knowing that it was.

    This altered my feelings dramatically and I felt proper humbled by the experience. It was very sobering. There's an article on the official site about the visit but I felt like sharing one or two things here in a less formal manner.

    The buildings are incredibly well decked out. Absolutely spotless. The gardens and all outside areas are beautiful and well-kept. None of the staff/volunteers looked like anything but human beings. No uniforms or badges or whatever. The place was like a big home full of many rooms each with its own role, be it the 'quiet room' where families (parents mainly) can relax, reflect etc, or the many play rooms, games rooms, cinema room etc. There are parents rooms too, for mums and dads who stay there with their children. And then the 'cool' room. It's the room where children who pass away are taken to, to stay until the next step whatever that may be. It's called end of life care.

    The lovely women who gave us a guided tour of the facility told us that on average, a child passes every 11 days in their care at Bluebell Wood. Not because they're doing owt wrong, it's the nature of the end of life care service they offer. They also offer home care, respite care, just lots and lots of care. It's incredible. It blew my mind.

    We all know these things occur. That little boys and girls are born into bodies that give up on them far too early. We know children, very small children die of cancer and other diseases. But seeing and hearing it all today really hit home. As you'd expect I suppose.

    We were welcomed lovingly by parents, children and staff alike. They loved Toby Tyke. They were genuinely happy that Barnsley FC visited. Especially one little girl and her mum and sister who were Barnsley fans. There are photos on the website. The mother was a trooper. You wouldn't know her daughter was on borrowed time. She even joked about Sheffield Wednesday players visiting and her daughter not wanting their gifts.

    You see, from what we were told, people assume that Bluebell Wood is a Sheffield charity. But it isn't. It covers South Yorkshire, North Notts, North Derbyshire. And so it's fantastic that the Club are on board supporting yet another superb charity.

    A word or two for Sessi and Stefan who were the players who attended. Absolute pleasure to share the experience with them. Both were fully attentive throughout, asked allsorts of questions and had photos galore taken as well as handing out gifts and signing merchandise. They weren't asked or expected to donate anything, but as we left and said our goodbyes, the lads went to their car, got out their wallets and the last we saw of them, had headed back inside the facility.

    I've realised this in my time at BFC so far, the Club has made huge strides in terms of community projects, charity work etc. Check out the twitter timeline today. It makes you proud/feel good.

    Stand-out moment was when I asked one of the ladies showing us around the garden area if every child here would die before their time. She sadly said they would, and probably at the facility. I then couldn't help but watch the little children playing and running, no older than 7 or 8 years old, not a care in the world..

    They've in recent years had their government funding cut (surprise surprise). It costs over £4,000,000 a year to run Bluebell Wood. Only 10% of their funding comes via the government. 90% is made up of donations, fundraisers and what-not.

    If you can help or want to read more, please check out their website - http://www.bluebellwood.org/our-services/how-do-we-help/end-of-life-care/

    Cheers for reading. And if anyone on here has experience of Bluebell Wood I'd love to hear about it. Absolute privilege at times doing the job I do.
     
  2. Jack Tatty (Formerly LouisBalfour)

    Jack Tatty (Formerly LouisBalfour) Well-Known Member

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    Choking up reading this mate.

    We'll done all.
     
  3. Journo Tyke

    Journo Tyke Well-Known Member

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    So sad that so many children die so young. Of course there are millions around the world, and they're all as important as each other.

    Having a little one yourself makes it hit home further.

    It's great that the club get involved with things like that, shows football's not all bad these days.

    Great work.
     
  4. ark

    ark104 (v2) Well-Known Member

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    Unfortunately I've had personal experience of Bluebell Wood. I was in the room with my wife's family at the moment when our 1 year old niece went to sleep for the last time. In no words can I do justice to the place and the outstanding staff who work there. It is the most heartbreaking yet life affirming place I've ever been. That people can give their lives to provide the comfort and care, day in day out, to parents and their families as they say goodbye to their children is beyond my comprehension. And believe me they live it with you.

    I won't say anymore other than I saw the club had been today and told my wife, who told her sister. Little things. A special place, full of special people, who look after the most special children in the world, who become stars in the sky.

    Sleep tight little one x
     
  5. Met

    Metatarsal Well-Known Member

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    It's a wonderful heartwarming but ultimately heartbreaking place, full of wonderful people, patients, their families and staff alike. They cared for a friend of my son earlier this year until he quietly drifted away after battling bone cancer. Just before his 15th birthday.

    A civil society can be judged on how it looks after its poor, needy, elderly, infirm and dying members. Which makes it absolutely scandalous how neglected the hospice movement is nationally in terms of funding.
     
  6. springvale red

    springvale red Well-Known Member

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    had me in tears reading that Whitey
     
  7. Gally

    Gally Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Thanks for taking the time to share this Whitey. I'm sat on the train welling up reading this thread, and Journo Tyke has nailed it when he said it hits home, even more, when you've got a little one at home.

    It does make me even more proud of our football club when I read about them getting involved in charities like this and it also highlights what's wrong in this country when they have to fund 90% of the costs of such an important facility from donations.
     
  8. Jimmy viz

    Jimmy viz Well-Known Member

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    Lovely read and well written. Never had the misfortune to visit a kiddies hospice but watched a good friend wither in an adult one. The people who staff them are amazing the true stars of society. Funding is shocking and of course we would rather buy bombs than increase funding.

    Thanks for writing this and thanks to the club for getting involved.

    Just gave my little one an extra cuddle and tried not to be grumpy when she followed her morning routine of waking me up at 6am to play 'Shopkins'.
     
  9. barnsley66

    barnsley66 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you YT.

    Brings life into perspective.
     
  10. Farnham_Red

    Farnham_Red Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Thanks for posting that. Hard to read without vision going a bit blurry

    To echo everyone else I am glad the club is involved with charities like this.
    The scandal is that Hospices are almost entirely dependent on donations. There is an excellent one in Farnham that is always fundraising and is sad they have to rely so much on support from the public and not government funding. I expect Bluebell Wood is just the same.

    The wonderful part is that the donations somehow keep coming to most of them
    The part I cant believe are the staff and volunteers at hospices - I couldn't cope with a job where a child you have got to know dies every few days. The fact that the people there not only cope but invest so much effort in support for the children and relatives is amazing.
     
  11. Nor

    NorthernDreamer Well-Known Member

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    A great read, I'm sure it was a very sobering experience and a real eye-opener. Whilst I don't have personal experience of Bluebell Wood, I am well aware of the great work that they do. As a Father and Grandfather I can't imagine what it would be like to have a little one with a terminal illness. I have first hand experience of caring for someone with cancer, thankfully in my case it wasn't terminal. Great to see the club involved with things like this.
     
  12. Gordon Owen

    Gordon Owen Well-Known Member

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    Brilliant piece Whitey.

    Since having a young un l can't get through a Children in Need tv night, it's a cruel world sometimes.
     
  13. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    As others have said on the thread, I've welled up reading your post, old mate. Thank you for posting it, Andy.
    Well done to Barnsley Football Club and Sessi D'Almeida & Stefan Payne in particular.
     
  14. dreamboy3000

    dreamboy3000 Well-Known Member

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    Great read. No parent should have to see their own child suffer, especially when so young when they should have their whole life ahead of them. Disgusting how much of their upkeep has to be through fundraising and donors when we give billions of foreign aid to wasted causes like when we gave away 15 million to help farting cows in Columbia. Excellent charity to get involved in, well done Barnsley Football Club :) Makes you proud to be a fan.
     
  15. John Peachy

    John Peachy Well-Known Member

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    Puts all other things into perspective.

    As others have said, it makes me angry that our government spends billions on arms & tax breaks to the wealthy, but fails to fully support such vital places.

    Good on the club & the fine people that keep these services going.
    Was an ill kid myself, but one of the lucky ones that came out the other side, obviously these places are for those
    not so fortunate. Every child deserves dignity, love & respect, but as we know that doesn't always happen.
    Thanks for the post mate, I'm sat at my computer with tears in my eyes.
     
  16. Mike Lowry

    Mike Lowry Well-Known Member

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    This had me in tears after reading it in bed last night and clicking through to the Hospice website.

    If BFC hadn't raised awareness of the Hospice and if Whitey hadn't written this piece I'd have remained unaware of what goes on at Bluebell Wood.

    Heart warming and heart breaking in such mindblowing doses.

    I have a 3 year old and 11 month old, and probably like most parents, live with that secret, horrible, nagging fear of ever having to go through the experience that these families and children do. I can't imagine the pain and extremes of emotion that they go through and hope I never have to come close.

    What this post, along with the work of BFC has done, is raise my awareness of the Hospice and the human side of what goes on there, and has directly led to me setting up regular donations to both Bluebell Wood and Barnsley Hospice today. I've given arbitrarily to Barnsley Hospice in the past but now feel compelled to give regularly to both organisations.

    If I can in some small way help to make a difference to the children, adults, families and organisations affected then I commit to doing so.

    I send my thoughts to anyone that needs the services and care offered by these amazing people and establishments. I send my love to the children involved wherever they may be now.

    (Apologies for my clumsy words in this post, but the whole thing is incredibly moving and I find it hard to articulate how this has made me feel).
     
  17. ATY

    ATYKE1 Well-Known Member

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    There but by the grace of God....

    Brilliant piece of work YT! These people are absolute saints.
     
  18. M.C.Tyke

    M.C.Tyke Active Member

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    Thanks so much for sharing this pal. As you rightly say, this is a fantastic service for children throughout our area. I have children on my current caseload of patients who attend Bluebell, and also families who were there with their children in the past. I can honestly say that 100% of the families that I have known have said that it is an amazing place with incredible staff. They clearly care for the whole family as well as the children who they support. I'll definitely donate.
     
  19. YTB

    YTBFC Guest

    I'm glad we've helped raise awareness. Some cracking responses. You Reds.
     
  20. Redstar

    Redstar Well-Known Member

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    Or perhaps how much money we waste on weapons we will never use.
     

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