diary of Theo Walcott

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by aardvark, Jul 11, 2006.

  1. aar

    aardvark New Member

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    a mate at work gave me this off a message board he goes on

    My summer holiday by theo walcott aged 8
    I went to a place caleed Germnay with my Uncle Sven and some other grown ups .It is a country in Europe where a bad man called Adolf used to live with his nazties. He does not live there anymore.Uncle Owen does live therer, and the grown ups say I can't talk about the bad man as it will make Uncle Owen cry if I do.

    In Germany there are lots of castles and some mountains. We are staying in a place called Baden Baden .Thats a silly name.

    Uncle Frank has the same name as his dad, thats silly too . His mum must get their underpants mixed up all the time.

    On the plane Uncle Sol sat next to me. He got me some sweets and wants to be my friend. He works at the place where I do my YTS, sodoes Uncle Freddie but him and Uncle Sol are not best friends anymore.
    Uncle Owen met us at the airport, he talks foreign. Uncle Wayne,Uncle Steven and Uncle David also talk funny. My mum says Uncle David talks like Orville he is a duck.

    Uncle Sol says Uncle David wears dresses and knickers ,and asked me if I ever wore them. Uncle Sol got me some pop.

    In Germany the grownups are going to play football. My grandad says we beat the in the olden days before my mum was born that is a long time ago.

    while the grownups went to play football,I went shopping with Auntie Vicky and some other girls.She got me a big ice cream and got herself a little one but said she was full before she had any and threw it away. She bought lots of shoes and handbags and let me play with Brooklyn. She says she used to be in a pop band and sang me a song ,I think she was telling fibs.

    I told Uncle Sol about my day out with Auntie Vicky and he sulked, then he bought me an even bigger ice cream with lots of hundreds and thousands and a flake.
    All the other grown ups have a girlfriend except Uncle Sol so he plays with me while they go out.Uncle Sven says I must keep Uncle Sol happy thats why I got took on holiday.

    The grownups went to play someone called Sweden . Uncle Sol was crying because Uncle Freddy played for them and would not talk to him . Uncle Sol bought me lots of sweets today and some crisps. Uncle Sven is from Swedenand I heard him on the phone to there boss last night. Uncle Michael hurt his knee and had to go home to his mum for a plaster . Uncle peter is a giant a proper giant like you see in books, he is rubbish at football though.

    Uncle Wayne had a sore toe at the start of our holidaybut it got better so they let him play football . Uncle Sol got me a present but I do not like them he says all Germans wear leather underpants and I should while I'm here. They are too tight for me.

    All the grown ups stared to call Uncle Wayne a potato head who stood on someone's winkie. He got shouted at by the referee. They are all saying that we have to go home now. Uncle Sol was crying again and I had to sit on his knee to make him stop. He had his mobile phone in his pocket I think.
    :pff :pff
     
  2. Farnham_Red

    Farnham_Red Administrator Staff Member Admin

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  3. D/T

    D/T New Member

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    RE: Faster than a speeding ...errr Kevin Donovan

    **** up did we...
     
  4. Farnham_Red

    Farnham_Red Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Damn - I'd have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you pesky fans

    Fortunately I can tidy that up.

    Not sure what happened mind
     
  5. D/T

    D/T New Member

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    RE: Damn - I'd have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you pesky fans

    you fecked up :)
     
  6. aar

    aardvark New Member

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    RE: Damn - I'd have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you pesky fans

    oohh terribly sorry some of us don't spend 24 hrs a day on here:eek:
     
  7. D/T

    D/T New Member

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    RE: Damn - I'd have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you pesky fans

    I dont.
     
  8. Ady

    Ady Active Member

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    chill

    pill
     
  9. Farnham_Red

    Farnham_Red Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    RE: Damn - I'd have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you pesky fans

    Neither do I :)
     
  10. Gue

    Guest Guest

    tinted screen

    arrived today. We'll have to arrange a run if you're in the country when I'm down
     
  11. Ady

    Ady Active Member

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    indeed..

    no worries "mate"
     
  12. Gue

    Guest Guest

    OK

    "mate" :pff

    (fishin)
     
  13. Ady

    Ady Active Member

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    Chocolate

    WTF is all that about, is it the "new" kids speak [​IMG]
     
  14. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Must be some new cool term

    for something.

    I dunno, I must be growing old :pff
     
  15. Map

    Mapplewell Tyke Well-Known Member

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    RE: Chocolate

    Its what was on the end of his sausage when he shoved it up Panda Tyke's Pudding.</p>
     
  16. D/T

    D/T New Member

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    RE: Chocolate

    you seen me recently?
     
  17. Map

    Mapplewell Tyke Well-Known Member

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    RE: Chocolate

    Cant say i have.
     
  18. Ady

    Ady Active Member

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    Guess

    Panda was blowing more then his trumpet.
     
  19. D/T

    D/T New Member

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    RE: Chocolate

    Well keep an eye out for me.
    cos i still havent a clue who you are.
     
  20. Map

    Mapplewell Tyke Well-Known Member

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    RE: Chocolate

    I will i will, but youve met me before.</p>
     

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