When tha dies..

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by Whitey, Mar 13, 2015.

  1. Carlycu5tard

    Carlycu5tard Well-Known Member

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    When you put it like that I might be convinced.....whichever variant you look at - if your islamic them 14 virgins aren't going to be virgins for long... and then what..14 of em - na doesn't bear thinking about. - Even Valhalla - feasting and that for eternity - I used to think I could eat fray bentos pies for eternity so I tried an experiment - I even got fed up of them after 2 weeks 3 days - so an eternity would be dreary.

    And if it's anything like my church an eternity of cucumber sandwiches and victoria sponge with everyone dressed in white playing whist - that is going to be fairly unbearable.

    Lets hope it's just like going to sleep for a very long time then. I do like sleep......I reckon I could sleep for eternity.
     
  2. man

    mansfield_red Well-Known Member

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    Does it ever specify the sex of the virgins? I'd be a bit pissed off if I turned up to my new digs in heaven to be greeted by 14 fat, spotty, mid 20s blokes in World of Warcraft t shirts.
     
  3. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    Well, in MY Valhalla, there's a vast array of foods, wines & beers, mate.:D
     
  4. DusThaNoIII

    DusThaNoIII Well-Known Member

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    Thas talkin daft nar tha dunt buy into that evolution balaxx surely animals was put on earth to serve man and man goes to heaven when he does if he wa good n hell if he wa bad end on it can't tell if thas all winding me up in this thread
     
  5. Whi

    Whitey Guest

    Agreed. Sleeping is ace.
     
  6. Kev b

    Kev b Well-Known Member

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    You turn to a star,
     
  7. dod

    dodworthred Well-Known Member

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    Like in south Park when Kenny dies in the film
    You go up to heaven with top less birds and just as you open some gates you fall underground and see Satan and he's having an affair with sadam hussein
     
  8. Red Lemonade

    Red Lemonade Well-Known Member

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    Most of these have been proved to be making it up, including the poster boy for the afterlife Alex Malarkey who admitted to lying.

    http://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jan/21/boy-who-came-back-from-heaven-alex-malarkey
     
  9. Whi

    Whitey Guest

  10. Y Goch

    Y Goch Well-Known Member

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    I can clearly recall being able to fly as a young kid. That does not happen either
     
  11. Egh

    Egham Tyke Well-Known Member

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    Sometimes in death comes a little bit of light. My dad died in 2008 and the funeral was at Ardsley Crem. Afterwards we went for a bite to eat at a village hall near where mum lives in Wombwell. Just couldn't face it and went back to mums on my own and sat on the bench outside her house . The bloke opposite knew who I was and that my dads funeral was that day, but we'd not really spoken but he stiill found time to ask if I was o.k. and fancied a drink . Really nice gesture and made me feel a bit better. 7 years this May but still miss him like mad
     
  12. Dub

    Dubai Tyke New Member

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    Apparent 50 virgins waiting for you there
     
  13. .:Tyke:.

    .:Tyke:. Banned Idiot

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    It's my favourite hobby, naps at dinner time, 40 winks after tea, and 8 hours a night, and 75% of Sunday's
     
  14. LDR

    LDRed Well-Known Member

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    F*ck all. Everything goes blank and your body rots/burns.

    Happy Friday people.
     
  15. Wat

    Watcher_Of_The_Skies Well-Known Member

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    You remember what it was like before you were born? Well it's probably just like that.

    Edit : although I really hope it's not.
     
  16. Bossman

    Bossman Well-Known Member

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    I'm coming back as a squirrel
     
  17. Sai

    SaintandGreavsie New Member

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    Eternity in heaven or hell. Deeper question - as no-one really wants to go to hell, how do you make sure you are heaven bound?

    Easy topic for my first post:nails:
     
  18. Mrs

    MrsHallsToffeerolls Well-Known Member

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    Ar worra squirrel last time rarnd Boss, far too energetic a life.
     
  19. Bossman

    Bossman Well-Known Member

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    Yeah but I'm going to come back as Billy Big Nuts and become a squirrel porn star
     
  20. Jay

    Jay Well-Known Member

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    Flower power, free love and the Vietnam war. Swings and roundabouts I suppose.
     

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