Cat ****

Get a cat. Fight cat **** with cat ****.

 

Thanks again everyone and in particular onlyonesteviecooper - you should be on Watchdog or summat.

My feline foe is a nocturnal shitter and the patio I mention is small stone/gravel based which I think is what attracts it.

Got two of the high pitched things which are very effective but the bairns also hear it and it wakes a 3 year old at two in the morning. Which means that not only am I also woken up but I'm also left pondering the fact that a cat is, at that very moment, curling one out somewhere in my garden.

Will keep you posted


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We had an ultrasonic cat scarer but I don't think it worked very well. One of our neighbours had one which connected to a hose pipe and gave them a good dowsing.

 

My cat scarer is a .22 BSA Meteor. They don't like it up em Mr Mainwaring.

 

Laughed so hard at this and your follow up post I could hardly breathe - did someone get a Roger's Profanisaurus as an early Xmas prezzie? Anyway I feel your pain, we have the same problem with our neighbourhood cats - if I ever get hold of one of them I'll be bringing my old rugby drop-kicking skills out of retirement.

 

Cats serve no purpose, you never hear of "guide cats for the blind", "guard cats", "sniffer cats" or "police cats". The few around here soon ended up as "flat cats", the traffic is very unforgiving.

 

Cats > Dogs


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bang on tingley. cats are about as much use as Anne Franks drumkit and thick as a submarine door. Simply have no discerning qualities, they cant even stand their owners...who by the way are mostly weird, very lonely and probably love horses too.........horses.....dont even get me started

 

Like your namesake of a couple of decades ago used to do with his goal scoring and acrobatics, you have brought much joy to readers on here this morning. Thanks for that. Properly laughing out loud at all of this thread

 

no probs prince, i do like your level headed posts also. Im truly humbled at the level of shared hate of the deviant four legged feline bird killers. Theres a lass on my shift at work whos just lost her cat (not dead tho) and shes receiving very kind encouragement from all her colleagues, including myself as really its the right thing to do.I know theres people out there thicker than a whale omlette but they still have feelings for these tiny pawed mouse murderers. Shes probably driving round Great Houghton now as I type looking for the illusive purveyor of death stares. Ive told her she wont find her, cats are more slippery than Rod Hulls roof tiles and the only way she might if she follows a trail of dead blue tits. I told her last week that cats have no loyalty...i was proved right, some pensionable aged spinster neighbour will have been feeding her christmas cake for the last week and seen as these cat thingies havent a shred of loyalty or charecter, she will be lapping it up for a while, until said pensioner finds old 'trixie' with her beloved budgie in its trap.....

 

K

Note to self: don't read any more of these posts while eating cake! I just very nearly choked when I got to the whale omelette bit.

Much as I hate what cats do on my lawn and in my flower beds. I sort of like them as animals. If I am in somebody else's house and they have a nice natured kitty I tend to find that said animal is on my lap, or chest, purring like a good un in no time. They like me and have no idea how much I dislike the ginger and black creature next door. I give him the hard stare when I see him perched safely on their bin or car bonnet. He looks down his nose in return.

 

I would never condone violence towards an animal. Apart from cats. Kick the sh*t out of the horrible little b*stard.

I don't like cats.

 

More slippery than rod hulls roof tiles, funniest line I've heard on ages top man not that the rod hull incident was funny by the way

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Is planting land mines still illegal ?


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I've come to the conclusion in all this that I'm not wrong in my long held view that the only good cat is a dead cat.


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If my lads football goes over the fence they throw it back. Same goes for cat cak if that's the neighbourly thing to do.

 

Precisely - that's what I always do. Why should I make my bin smell with it?

As I said earlier in the thread there is a trampoline at the bottom of their garden and I lob the doings over my fence. If some lands on there, oh well. Actually I hope it does because their garden is in such a crap state that they probably would never know the missiles were there. Unless they happened to be standing there of course. That would be perfect :tongue:

 

Bravo.

 

Flamethrower, the good old incendiary persuader, never fails to work.