Things that are proper w@nk

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by Tyketical Masterstroke, Feb 2, 2016.

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  1. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    Getting old.
    I'm getting more aches & pains. I'm getting more illnesses. As well as them becoming more frequent, they last longer and take longer to recover from. My pathetic levels of self pity & sulking are reaching greater heights. How can I possibly grow more hair in my ears and up my nose than I do on my head? I'm becoming grumpier far more often.
    :D:D
     
    JLWBigLil, Feb 2, 2016
    #41
  2. MarioKempes

    MarioKempes Well-Known Member

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    Thankfully not. I had to go pick my daughter up from work so I completely forgot.
     
    MarioKempes, Feb 2, 2016
    #42
  3. arabian_ian

    arabian_ian Well-Known Member

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    This flu bug I'm suffering from ATM. :(
     
    arabian_ian, Feb 2, 2016
    #43
  4. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    It's made me lose my voice, old mate. Crystal & the dogs are devastated, honest(!):D
     
    JLWBigLil, Feb 2, 2016
    #44
  5. tobyornottoby

    tobyornottoby Well-Known Member

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    The cost of fireworks
    Watching bike races
    Lottery winners
    Whoever sleeps with Keeley Donovan.
    Nasal hair
    Alarm clocks
    Recent Championship football tables (we were low. Now we aren't there)
    SNP leaders
    The bloke 3 doors down our street.
    My putting.
    Booze being bad for you.

    It's proper **** that I lost the rest of my list.
     
    tobyornottoby, Feb 2, 2016
    #45
  6. arabian_ian

    arabian_ian Well-Known Member

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    Won't stop me making my way to the pub on Thursday to watch the Reds. I'm saving up for Wembley already.
     
    arabian_ian, Feb 2, 2016
    #46
  7. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    Won't stop me from watching it on the telly whilst laid on the settee.:D
     
    JLWBigLil, Feb 2, 2016
    #47
  8. arabian_ian

    arabian_ian Well-Known Member

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    And being served coffee and biscuits by your good wife no doubt.
     
    arabian_ian, Feb 2, 2016
    #48
  9. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    That's the hope, Ian old mate. The reality may well be somewhat different!:D
     
    JLWBigLil, Feb 2, 2016
    #49
  10. fir

    fired Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Pouting

    That Judge Rinder programme

    Girls contorting their whole body because they are carrying a Michael Kors handbag

    Going for a blood pressure test to be told your blood pressure is high

    White whine sold in pubs (no I don't want Echo Falls)

    Peer group pressure that makes 11 year olds think they need their eyebrows waxing

    People who steal dogs

    Junior football managers living their dream at the expense of the kids they're supposed to be including

    People using a disabled parking space, then jogging into the venue they've parked outside

    Tonsilitis
     
    fired, Feb 2, 2016
    #50
  11. Con

    Conan Troutman Well-Known Member

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    How much do you stand to lose?:D
     
    Conan Troutman, Feb 2, 2016
    #51
  12. LDR

    LDRed Well-Known Member

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    £5, but it was a fiver I gained from a free bet earlier in the week :)

    Edit: Swansea have just scored so I've gained £10 as I had over 0.5 goals!
     
    LDRed, Feb 2, 2016
    #52
  13. Con

    Conan Troutman Well-Known Member

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    Nice one. I get £10 if Arsenal and Southampton dunt draw 2-2.
     
    Conan Troutman, Feb 2, 2016
    #53
  14. arabian_ian

    arabian_ian Well-Known Member

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    Having the flu and no being able to accommodate this charming girl who just sent me this email. As I'm currently under the weather if any of you young gents would like a bit of company feel free to apply. Good Luck.

    Good day to you, how are you today?
    I am alone lady want to meet for date.
    I'm - Yuliya, I'm very positive girl and I have many interests.
    Do you interesting to start love?
    I am thought, maybe this is our destiny. Who knows?
    Reply to me and we can begining dialog.
    This is my personal-mail: yuliya.yuliyass@mail.com
    Bye Yuliya !!
     
    arabian_ian, Feb 2, 2016
    #54
  15. fat

    fatalbert Well-Known Member

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    Don't you dare go near my lovely Yuliyass, she's my wife.
     
    fatalbert, Feb 2, 2016
    #55
  16. Tyk

    Tyketicus Active Member

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    why doesn't this have a smell pecker? it would help if could also see what i was typing. keyboard suffering from mango juice overloads ffs
     
    Tyketicus, Feb 2, 2016
    #56
  17. Sloppy Tyke

    Sloppy Tyke Active Member

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    and you know who's fault it is dont you LD, its that damn banker keef hill again for everything that gets mentioned in this thread, hes always to blame.
    on second thoughts though, he cant take the flak for you repeating comments on here. thats all your own doing ;)
     
    Sloppy Tyke, Feb 2, 2016
    #57
  18. cro

    crossred Active Member

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    Deffo agree with Mrs Browns Boys
     
    crossred, Feb 2, 2016
    #58
  19. fir

    fired Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    I met John Mitchell, (Weatherman), in Skipton on the night of the Bradford, Barnsley match. (after you lot did your walk, the one I couldn't do cos I was on our Annual Fancy Dress, Girls Weekend). So I walked into the bar, dressed in my Sound of Music / Curtain clothes outfit, and spotted a guy with a Bradford scarf on.

    Got chatting to him about the game, and the fact that some pals of mine had walked to the game. Mitchell.... rudely interrupted proceedings asking why I (and the others) was dressed like that. Put him straight. "I'll tell you all about it after I've had a match report from your friend". Oi. Weatherman. No. We're Talking Football.
     
    fired, Feb 2, 2016
    #59
  20. Red

    Red-Taff. Well-Known Member

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    is 'proper w@nk' an oxymoron?
     
    Red-Taff., Feb 2, 2016
    #60
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