FAO Conan Troutman......and Admin

An accusation has been made by Conan in the 'In Defence of Hemsworth' thread.
That accusation is a lie.
In the post he says an 11 year old should retaliate in such circumstances.

What I was trying to explain (although I may have done it clumsily) is this:
If someone was doing that to you at 12 to 15 years old why should they return???
They are not kids (e.g. 4 years old) at that age.
It's like someone punching you in the face every time you walk into a house - so would you keep walking into that house when you were 12 to 15 years old ???
So I'm asking a VALID question- what makes people return time after time ?
And NO !!! - I'm not saying it's because they enjoy it because clearly in later life they are living in torment.
This doesn't just relate to sexual things it also has a barring on things like modern slavery.

I've had this conversation with others away from this message board - I haven't heard one reasonable explanation.

 

What's your favourite sandwich filling?

 

Have you and the people you discussed this with heard of the concept of grooming. Also you may wish to study and analyse Zimbardo's Stanford Prison study to give you some insight. As may some of the Bennett Levy studies and some aspects of Durkeim could also give you some insights. Your approach to things sounds glib maybe you don't mean it to but it does.

 

well I'm not an expert

on the concept of grooming or mental conditioning, and personally I can't understand why they do return.
BUT the harsh unsavoury facts are that many people do (return), be it children or adults in abusive relationships and for me they deserve every sympathy for the mental state that this brainwashing has left them in.
Personally I can't imagine ever standing for it but they select targets carefully and ..........

 

It may sound glib as you put it but it's a genuine question.
All I can relate this to is how I was at that age and how mates of mine were at that age - I don't think any of us could have been owt like groomed (as you put it) like these guys have been.
Very alien concept.
Makes you wonder if the people that do these things have a sort of 6th sense and can pick up on sign of vulnerable individuals.

 

I think your last sentence is very true. I think the people who engage in this type of behaviour are very clever and cunning. They know the risks of detection and select victims very carefully. Its like people who knock there partners around they select and break down the person they abuse with a lot of care.

 

How old are you?

 

Online he's 27, a blonde fitness instructor from Wetherby.

 

It's impossible to know why they return unless you are in their position, you hear many stories of husbands abusing their wives and yet they still stay with them, I would guess that mostly it's out of fear or hoping that they'll change but going back to your original question unless you've walked in these people's shoes then you or me will never understand why they return, the one thing I'm pretty sure of it wont be because they enjoy it,

 

You didn't phrase it anything like that. You made a very derogatory reference to the situation like "bum raped" or "arse raped" or some other drivel.

It didn't read like a genuine attempt to start a serious discussion - it was an attempt to provoke a reaction. Clear as day.

I'd have banned you for life.