Random childcare thread.

This cropped up as a side conversation in a recent Zoom meeting.

As a young un, I didn't fancy flying very much. So in 1990 when my parents spent a week abroad on their first foreign holiday I gave it a miss and stayed home by myself. I was 15 at the time.

My work colleagues couldn't believe that.

Since about the age 13/14 my mum also worked late shifts as a carer and occasionally my Dad would work late shifts too.

That meant I was on my own from about 5pm when mum left to 8:30pm when Dad got back. This was also a surprise to them.

It honestly never registered with me as an issue, never felt "abandoned" - in fact quite the reverse and I was proud my parents trusted me (it also meant extra time on the Amiga!).

Is 3 hours alone from 13/14 occasionally and a week at 15 that big a deal?

I was quite surprised that my work mates considered it as surprising as they did.

 

IMHO it depends on the maturity of the kid in question. Some would be fine and even thrive, some wouldn't.

Of your examples, speaking from my own experience, the 3 hours on an evening doesn't seem out of the ordinary at all. The week alone seems to be taking the issue to an extreme, but I'm not judging, I don't know you and I didn't know your character and maturity when you were 15. The people in the best position to make that judgement were your parents.

 

As you say Jay, I do think a lot depends on the maturity of the child, I remember convincing my mum and dad that I was old enough to be left alone for a few hours while they went for a few drinks to the local, however spending a few hours up at A&E having a small marble from my nose convinced them I wasn’t quite ready to be left alone again for a while.

 

Maybe next year

 

My rule with my kids is I only left them if they were happy with it However, not leaving a 13/14 year old for a few hours alone is ridiculous. Mine would be happy to be left all day at that age. And now we have mobiles they can ring or message any problems.

15 a bit young to be left for a week imo

I think children need a sense of responsibility, to make decisions away from their parents in order to transition to grown up life. A lot of schools for example won't let kids walk home alone until year 5 or 6 now. Mine could if they wanted to from age 7 (year 3)

 

Agree with pretty much everything said- 15 a bit young for a week alone but the evening thing not a problem IMO if child happy with it.

 

Optimistic

 

So many objects so few orifices.

 

Good job we never owned a hamster

 

You say at the age of 15 it is too young it is too young to be left alone for a week.For God’s sake,I left school at 15half on Friday and working on Monday.Stop pandering over kids way too much of it these days.

 

That's the point though, adulthood started earlier back then. Now you're considered a child until 18.

 

My parents went out a couple of times a week, Saturday night and Thursday night. They were always back by 10 midweek, 11-30ish at weekends. I would have been 13, I reckon, when they started doing it. This was in the mid-1970s.

As an only child, I absolutely loved having the house to myself. I can still vividly remember watching the first ever episode of The Good Life all by myself and laughing my head off. A late supper in front of MOTD was great too.

They waited until I was 16 and working before they had a week away without me. That felt a little weird, but I managed to cook myself a Sunday dinner with chicken, mash, veg, and Yorkshire pud, so I must have had my head screwed on. More so than nowadays, I reckon...

 

We bought our first house when I was 21 and my wife was just 19.

I'd been working since I was 16. I also stated working away on my 17th birthday and that involved booking train tickets, overnight accommodation etc. First trip was an audit in Worcester, I remember being very nervous the night before.

Different times.

 

No problem at all as an adolescent when my parents were out I vvanked myself silly.

 

maybe upgrade to a bowling ball next time

 

What ya trying to say?

 

My Dad was sending me down to the Spar for teabags, newspaper and loaves of bread from being about 8 years old.

 

I read that without looking at the name of the poster, but I instantly knew it was you. Must be the handwriting.

 

It was an autobiographical anecdote

 

An autobiographical vvanknote, surely?