Help, moral compass...

My next door neighbour was constantly screaming at her then 8 year old son each day and he looked quite pale/ sad, so me and then girlfriend decided to report it to NSPCC anonymously. Next thing I know she comes banging on my door kicking off because social services have been round, working out it was me.

She wasn't very approachable prior to this before anyone suggests that, just a horrible woman. Caused me no end of feeling uncomfortable for 3 years. Can't wait to get away. That's what trying to do the right thing leaves you with.

 

You did do the right thing there.

 

Yep, as crappy as it is, I'd happily take me feeling uncomfortable for a few years over a kid being made to feel that way.

 

What made things worse for us, was that the Police apparently shared ad verbatim our talks with them to our neighbours who with the greatest of respect, are not the "brightest" folk you could come across plus they support Leeds.

Our adjoining properties are slightly offset to the point that if you look out of our kitchen window from the sink, you can see our neighbour if they are standing at their sink. Not long after the incident, my wife was washing some crockery when our neighbour appeared at their window. My wife told the Police that he deliberately fixed her with a menacing stare which the Police must have repeated to our neighbours.

A couple of weeks after the event their kids rabbit broke out of its hutch and sought refuge in the cavity between our respective garages. Next thing we know, the two kids and their Dad are trampling all over our rockery with some treats and a net and subsequently destroyed around sixty quids worth of bedding plants.

My wife went outside to remonstrate with our neighbour. He responded with a mouthful of expletives which ended with " Gerrin you cow" etc. etc. His wife came out and probably as a result of the Policemans wrongful interpretation of my wife's discussions ( re-saying that her husband stared at her ) shouted " yes and if you think my husband fancies you, you are deluded you stupid idiot." Nothing we could say after that, could or would ever improve the situation which for ten years or so descended into sheer hell. As I've said now their sons have grown and left home, things have improved, but you feel like you are walking on eggshells.

 

I know i did and im proud of myself, but in reality it made no difference and made my life uncomfortable. I would do the same if i could go back though.

 

It might have made a difference. No doubt she was aware that people had clocked onto her behaviour and may have calmed herself down because of that, if only so she didn't get into trouble. The kid would also know that someone was looking out for them.

 

Yeah she knew her card was marked from thereon in. Like i say i dont regret it, but it has made me hate living here, not wanting to spend time in garden in summer etc too. She still shouts at him regularly. Im moving this year all being well so looking forward to getting away.

 

Good luck hope you get moved mate. While out neighbour's weren't our main reason for wanting to move it certainly influenced our choice of house. We have paid the extra cost to get ourselves into a detached house. Some of that is because I'm aware my kids can be noisy but a lot of it is down to experiencing late night parties from our previous neighbour's. TVs mounted on the party wall played at extreme volume ect. All attempts at rational discussion failed. Nearly came to blows with the teenage son of the guy who lived there.
It's always a risk you could drop on someone anywhere but I have no shared wall or drive or any potential access issues that are likely to come up. It's such a relief.

 

The terrible thing when it comes to w4nk neighbours is if it comes to moving and you've had a 'dispute' then it has to be divulged before a sales transaction happens. Or so I'm lead to believe.

My mum had a similar one year's back and I nearly got 'done' for it. Bullying my mum who lives on her own. Accusing her (as a teacher) of taking fotos of their kids when all she was doing was taking pics of the car's he was illegally mending in the street and it was the council's advise to take them.

 

Only if police was involved, I think.

 

Or council and/or solicitors so I'm lead to believe. I'll stand corrected like.

 

Yeah just checked. I don't think I need to disclose what happened because it isn't ongoing and was an anonymous report about a child, not a dispute per se. It is more for boundary issues and noise etc I think.

 

I've been really lucky with neighbours thank goodness.

 

Sadly, my neighbours have been really unlucky...

 

I didn't say anything when I sold my house and I seem to remember a question about disputes but it was worded with "disputes that have involved " and listed a few official bodies.

 

Definitely report them. Never mind all this nonsense about community and society, the selfish gits need to learn.

 

If ever there was a perfect sentence which summed up the lockdown supporting community, there it is right there.

 

Try heading over to John Peachy's thread if you want to see a community supporting each other.