After some advice...

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by shenk1, Mar 24, 2021.

  1. Hooky feller

    Hooky feller Well-Known Member

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    Never fall in in love with a tennis player.
    Love means nothing to em.
     
  2. winged avenger

    winged avenger Well-Known Member

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    Always wear two pairs of trousers when tha golfing,in case tha gets a hole in one.
     
  3. Austiniho

    Austiniho Well-Known Member

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    Convince your wife that she’s “followed through” during the night by slipping a chocolate button between the cheeks of her arse as she sleeps.
     
  4. Tyke_67

    Tyke_67 Well-Known Member

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    I'm not wasting chocolate :)

    upload_2021-3-25_20-38-26.png
     
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  5. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    Always check for big role before closing the trap door
     
  6. wak

    wakeyred Well-Known Member

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    It’s better to keep your mouth shut and be thought of as an idiot then open it and have the suspicion confirmed.
     
  7. tyk

    tykesfan Well-Known Member

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    If you're going to start cross country skiing, start with a small country.
     
  8. Bossman

    Bossman Well-Known Member

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    Get your money on Trump still being the president.
     
  9. Tyke_67

    Tyke_67 Well-Known Member

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    I've got some bad news for you......o_O
     
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  10. Skinner

    Skinner Well-Known Member

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    or that autospell dint change bog to big......
    soz mate couldn't resist it...lol
     
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  11. man

    mansfield_red Well-Known Member

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    Everything in moderation, including moderation.

    Try everything once, except incest and folk dancing.
     
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  12. Redhelen

    Redhelen Well-Known Member

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    What's wrong with a bit of folk dancing!?
     
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2021
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  13. Red

    RedMonk Well-Known Member

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    Always wear sunscreen
     
  14. Red Lemonade

    Red Lemonade Well-Known Member

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    Never ever bloody anything ever.

    I've lived my life by that.
     
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  15. Dar

    Darfield138 Well-Known Member

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    Don't argue with stupid people. They just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
     
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  16. Tyke_67

    Tyke_67 Well-Known Member

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    If you can't reason with logic - baffle them with bullsh1t :)
     
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  17. Hooky feller

    Hooky feller Well-Known Member

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    Pity it was role instead of roll n’all. :).
    Soz:)
     
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  18. Hooky feller

    Hooky feller Well-Known Member

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    Funny as fcku.
    Me, ar lass. Bro in law and sister in law. On a cruise. The cleaner had left chocolates on the bed the night before. (Little to my knowledge.) I Gets up next morning. It looked like an explosion. Our lass dragged the others in to look. Whilst I was trying to explain to the cleaner in embarrassingly stupid broken English. that I hadn’t Shat missen. He started raising his arms as if to say ya dirty bugger. Whilst laughing his head off. :oops::) As were the rest on em.
     
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  19. Archey

    Archey Well-Known Member

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    If you're going to watch Black Mirror, don't start with season 1 episode 1. It's the worst episode and it will put you off the rest of it.

    Don't bother buying fifa football games when everyone else does. Subscribe to EA play for £20 a year and get it for free, 8 months after everyone else. Same goes if you play Need for Speed, the Star Wars games, NFL, NHL, NBA etc.

    Making the perfect poached egg. Fill the saucepan to the brim with boiling water. Add a dash of white vinegar, pop in your egg for 3 minutes. Reduce the heat if it starts to boil over.
     
  20. Redhelen

    Redhelen Well-Known Member

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    In the last point, whisk the water round before breaking the th into it!
     

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