Oli Shaw Oli is short for Oligarch He owns 7 belts but tends not to wear any of them, except on a Tuesday. He has previously been in rehab for Strawberry Jaffa Cake addiction. His favourite prime number is 1117. His grandfather is one of 8 brothers. 5 of them were questioned as part of the Jack the Ripper investigation. During last year's Eurovision song contest, Oli ordered a Prawn Balti, egg fried rice, 2 chipatis, 4 poppadoms and washed it all down with a bottle of babycham. His favourite podcast is 'My Dad Wrote a Porno', because his own dad, has only ever written a slow cooker cook book. He's never seen a walrus.
His favourite day of the week is Wetherspoons Curry Thursday . he only drinks bottled water as tap water gives him a rash around the genital area. He auditioned for naked attraction but failed the finals . Once On a visit to his hometown he tried speaking with a Yorkshire Accent to impress his family and friends but his mother stopped talking to him for a week because of a misunderstanding . He swam the English Channel there and back but he didn’t tell anyone until a recent interview in the Huddersfield examiner .
I actually googled prime numbers and the site I used had a list. I didn't realise that when you clicked on the link, the prime numbers on the list turned red. And I'm not the best with maths. I've rectified it now.
Weren't 10,000 men interviewed in connection? I've at least 2 mates who's dad's were questioned in relation to it.
His family made carpets for the poor people in Darton. He loves to sing scat and vocalize with his uncle Ian Shaw. (look it up !) His favourite colour is burnt umber. Due to an unfortunate episode in his childhood his willy looks like a barber's pole.
He walks backwards and spits, hes deaf in one eye and blind in one ear If anyone laughs at him he lifts up his left arm, shows them his pit and p155ses all over them. As off writing his right arm is heavily strapped to his side, has he still hasn't mastered his bowel movements yet. In his spare time away from football, he's a member of the caravan para gliding club, which sees him strap a caravan to his back and jump off notorious high structures, having climbed them first. He openly admits to being vegan ( don't they all ) and can be the grounds man's best friend or worst enemy depending how you look at it when it comes to eating grass. At times he's a binge eater and is well known for snacking on grass whilst face planting during games...he carries faces of his favourite cartoon characters in a specially sewn pocket in his over sized shorts.for easy access to the faces he plants. His aim in life at the moment like many is to survive this Tory Government's policies Educated to comprehensive level in Scotland, he freely admits to using sub titles so folk can understand him, whilst at school he attended many fancy dress parties, whereby he would wear his kilt upside down without underwear and when folk asked him, what he'd come has , he would simply reply, a shuttlecock Politically he is in favor of an independent Scotland, having previously voted for Scottish Power on numerous occasions until he found out they supplied electric and he'd been conned by a door to door salesperson He currently dates a 53 year old woman who has 7 children from 5 different fathers, is presently serving time for shop lifting, manslaughter and embezzlement of company resources, she also votes Conservative. unfortunately, whilst she does get day release from prison, his parents won't have her in the family home due to her being a Leeds united supporter. Further to the above he often gets invited to our old friend George spicers lavish cocktail parties whereby he becomes magic Mike and proudly balances 13 budgie on his pen1s, admittedly the last one stands on one leg
He likes white swans and his favourite flavour is Bewick. His favourite pickle is a pickled walnut. On Fridays and Saturdays he always has toast for breakfast, even on Christmas and Easter. His best friend is called Barry Strensham. Oli can do skateboarding tricks but funnily he can't do a frontside 360 He studied Russian History 1632-1778 at university school and won a prize for his essay on the Meanings of Russian Peasant Food.
His favourite A-Team member is HM Murdock. His favourite bird is Freebird. His favourite comedian is Liz Truss. His favourite colour is #FF0000 His favourite door is revolving.
