Harassment of ex help needed

Hiya just looking for some advice so my wife left me 8 weeks ago now and when she first left with the kids, phoning her texting her emailing her to contact her I was warned by the police to not contact her and to use a third party to contact about children which became problematic so I had no choice but to speak to her about the kids and the communication from her has been shocking regarding my son and now I’ve been told I have to attend donny police station at 9am on Saturday to be interviewed under police caution. I am absolutely terrified of all of this my life was turned on it’s head in a flash and I acted irrationally with it.. the messages I sent her were all nice messages no malice or abuse just telling her how much I loved her and wanting to sort things out with the kids anyone had anything similar?

 

You need to take a solicitor.. don't go without one.

 

Hoping to sort one today

 

Good luck mate ,hard as it MIGHT be DON'T lose your temper ( not saying you will) but trust me it will go against you. Stay strong it will all get sorted with the kids and you could be better off in the long run but you won't see that yet. All the best mate.

 

So incredibly unfair still on so many fathers in this day and age.

 

Just to add, (Your solicitor will advise better than me I'm sure) but at some stage it's possible they may come over all matey, and suggest accepting a Police caution is an easy way round things, wrapping it up now and not having to attend Court etc. If you're confident you have done nothing wrong do not accept the Caution... it is an admission of guilt.

 

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There are three sets of competing interests in these kinds of situations.

My own sympathy lies squarely with the kids. They're the ones you can guarantee are not responsible for this kind of mess.

 

Definitely agree with that mate. I should clarify and of course state I'm assuming said poster isn't in anyway abusive etc. Just a normal dad

 

Police officers nowadays always take the easy way out(trust me I know).As previous poster said don't accept the caution.

 

Been here, got the t-shirt and been sat on both sides of the interview table.

Definitely get a solicitor or request the police arrange for the duty solicitor to be there. They'll speak with him/her first and disclose the investigation and evidence so far. He/she will then tell you and advise you on the best course of action - answer honestly or go no comment. Probably the first option.

Then do that, speak candidly and if your emotions kick in then let them. Show that your only intentions were around accessing your kids and that there was no malice etc.

The lowest form of outcome should be a Police Information Notice (PIN) which is a formal stop what you're doing kind of thing. They might look for a caution but like what has been said before, don't just accept this, be advised from your solicitor.

Deep breaths, be the bigger person and good luck.

 

Follow the advice and find a third person to mediate between you and your ex.

 

No I’m not abusive just a guy who’s world fell apart and tried to get it back albeit not in the best way but like I say the messages I sent my wife were all love loving and amicable ones she was the one sending abusive ones but that doesn’t matter i just want to move past all of this and see my kids. I know ppl are saying don’t accept the caution but I suppose I was harassing her technically so I will be open and honest but I am remorseful. And it has stopped

 

What kind of advice is this? How could he be confident he's done nothing wrong? Of course he's done something wrong he's written himself that he was told by the police to stop harrassing this woman and did so anyway!

 

It hasn't got that far with me.

Get a solicitor.

 

I was meaning the content of the messages and the fact that he says the 3rd party contact that was suggested by the Police is being ignored...bearing in mind he has had no legal representation its highly possible that a legal party may conclude that the messages are not harassment...and that whoever told him not to attempt to contact her may have overstepped their authority.

 

Reading between the lines he's still at the begging and pleading stage at the beginning. Now grief has kicked in the messages have stopped from him and he's not feeling like fighting this caution because he's resigned to the situation. He needs to try and snap out of this and defend himself.

 

I have accepted The marriage is over the begging pleading is over I just wanted a plan in place for the kids and the communication back from her and her parents wasn’t great when I needed to know things like about school uniforms phone bills I pay and other things that needed to be sorted but it was difficult..

 

Also just to add I have nothing else on my record never been in bother with the police before.. and I have not been abusive or malicious in any of my contact with my ex first 3 weeks was about how much I loved her and then it’s just been about the kids since then.

 

It was opposite for me mate. My ex couldn't wait to dot the I's and cross the T's.