Made me laugh

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by Connor, Feb 25, 2018.

  1. North Yorks Red

    North Yorks Red Well-Known Member

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    Was down Barnsley today and found a a Ponty End season ticket nailed to a tree.
    I thought I’m having that!
    You can never have too many nails!
     
    Last edited: Oct 25, 2021
  2. kestyke

    kestyke Well-Known Member

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    Got my Halloween pumpkin already made for trick or treat.... swear-pumpkin.jpg
     
  3. scarf

    scarf Well-Known Member

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    Nah. You want one of these. IMG-20211022-WA0002.jpg
     
  4. Archey

    Archey Well-Known Member

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    The CEO of IKEA has just been elected Prime Minister of Sweden.

    The first thing he needs to do is assemble his cabinet.
     
  5. Red

    Reds Fan Well-Known Member

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  6. Father Benny Cake

    Father Benny Cake Well-Known Member

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    Shame the clip doesn’t last another 10 seconds, Shepherd asks the other contestant and she agrees with the answer!

    These people have got the vote.
     
  7. Did

    Didcot Red Well-Known Member

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    To be fair Iam sure the contestant was thinking of Homer Simpson (who I am pretty sure did not write any epic poems). That said, answer from tipping point contestants frequently appear in Private Eye's "Dumb Britain" column.

    I think the right answer has something to do with tinned rice pudding.;)
     
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  8. KamikazeCo-Pilot

    KamikazeCo-Pilot Well-Known Member

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    Food of the Gods you mean? Pie and peas
     
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  9. Archey

    Archey Well-Known Member

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    There was one last week. The question was, a group of moles shares its name with which British political party? Now I didn't know the answer, but I could give an educated guess at labour. The lady answering the question, said Liberal Democrats. A Liberal Democrat of Moles!
     
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  10. Did

    Didcot Red Well-Known Member

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    As uncle Staveley might say "I heard that, Pardon!"

    Here's another one from Tipping point that made it to the same edition of Private Eye:

    The first televised presidential address From the Oval Office in 1947 was given by which American president?

    Answer given "George Washington".
     
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  11. dearnevalleyviper

    dearnevalleyviper Well-Known Member

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    An 80 year old couple are shagging up against a fence and they are going at it like nutters , arms and legs flying everywhere.
    When they've finished they fall to the floor and the old woman says, "F#ck in hell you never shagged me like that 50 years ago."
    To which the old man replied, "50 years ago that f#cking fence wasn't electric."
     
  12. dearnevalleyviper

    dearnevalleyviper Well-Known Member

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    Daley Thompson, Tessa Sanderson and Steve Cram are all round at Seb Coe's house for tea.
    Steve brought the fish, Tessa brought the chips, Daley brought the mushy peas and Seb provided the salt and vinegar. Suddenly there is a knock at the door so Seb gets up to answer. "Who is it?", asks everyone in unison,

    "It's Fatima wi t'bread."
     
  13. Yor

    Yorky39 Member

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  14. Hooky feller

    Hooky feller Well-Known Member

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    The full version.lol.
     
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  15. Hooky feller

    Hooky feller Well-Known Member

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    .The urge to sing ‘the lion sleeps tonight’ is never more than a whim away.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2021
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  16. Con

    Connor Well-Known Member

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  17. Mul

    MullerRed Well-Known Member

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    Chien Lee sez: "Schopp-a-lop-a-lop-a-chop!"

    Markus sez: "If you really loved me, you'd swallow!"
     
  18. Did

    Didcot Red Well-Known Member

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    If the clocks go back tonight, I have a problem.

    I can't remember where I got mine from.
     
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  19. Did

    Didcot Red Well-Known Member

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    Back in the day I invented the Cold Air Balloon.

    It never took off.

    I bought the current Mrs. DR a fridge for her birthday.

    It was great to see her face light up when she opened it.
     
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  20. North Yorks Red

    North Yorks Red Well-Known Member

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    if it was as topical as that joke it wouldn’t have been currant!:D
     

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