My Club

I've watched Barnsley FC for about 50 years and I've seen several promotions some relegations some good cup runs some memorable games when we've taken on the Champions of Europe and given em a game. I've seen us be good I've seen us be bad. I've cried tears of joy and despair but what I've never felt before is the total apathy I feel now. Defeats used to hurt now I just expect them there's a numbness. On Saturday when the goal went in where as normally there would swearing and cursing with the wife calling me a ******** for carrying on like a two year old that's had their favourite toy took off them there was nothing just numbness I turned off the radio and went and sat down, my lad who hasn't the same amount of time invested as me so lost interest a few weeks ago didn't even ask if we'd lost because he knew but not because he'd been listening to the match but just because he expected us to lose. My late Dad who was responsible for infecting me with the BFC virus when I was a nipper would always say that it'll hurt you following Barnsley FC because they'll be downs as well as ups they'll make you feel sick to the pit of your stomach one week but like you're walking on air the next and he was right they did. I'll never forget the Wilson promotion and calling him when Marcelle scored the second he was at home because of heart trouble and couldn't go and hearing him cry like a baby because his team were finally going to play in the top league. I remember going to the old Wembley with him for the play off final despite his doctor telling him he shouldn't go. I remember the hurt we both felt when we lost. Those memories are there they always will be as will the ones I've shared with my kids since my dad passed but while ever the current owners, all of them and their yes men are at the club my feelings for the club are fading.

 

Very well put, I think a lot of us fans have the same feelings of total apathy.
Once apathy has set in it can be difficult to regain the previous enthusiasm again.

 

Very eloquently put and come cracking memories in there, some of which I also share. And you're old man was right in instilling a dash of realism in you regarding what it is to be a Barnsley fan. But what we have now is something else.

I actually like Khaled and his enthusiasm, and the personal touch that others have witnessed from him. But I don't like the owners one bit, I think they are shady characters. The manner in which they do business doesn't align with our Barnsley values. In my humble opinion.

 

Strange isn’t it that defeat is now the expectation and doesn’t hold the pain that it should. However I have taken the standpoint that the owners will not destroy the love I have for my club, not their club. Bizarrely I am looking forward to match days as it gives me the opportunity to say you can’t force me out. I know others have a different stance and I respect that. Despite everything I will renew my season ticket for next year because of my happy memories of Glavin, Redfearn and my old neighbour Glyn Riley. Hopefully next year the defeats will start to hurt again that’s when we will know things are getting better. Keep the faith.

 

Great post and I share all of the things you say. Enthusiasm is fuelled by wins and there was a little glow after QPR, but old stagers like us need to see a lot more fuel to light the fire.

 

I wonder if any of the board level people at the club ever get to read stories like this? And if so, does it give them the first, tiniest inkling that something has gone horribly wrong?

 

My apathy exists because the owners and I no longer appear to share the same goals and ambitions, which is the first time I've known this to be the case since I started supporting BFC.

Essentially, what we have now is an imitation of Barnsley Football Club. There's a team that plays at Oakwell in a red and white kit, but it's essentially a shell of the thing that I truly cared about, which has had its soul systematically sucked out of it.

Last season might have well have been 20 years ago, given how quickly it has been unravelled by those in charge.

 

I doubt it. At most they might offer stairfoot red a free flatbread.

 

Excellent post which almost mirrors my experience at United. In fact it mirrors anyone who follows any club. It’s awful at times following a club and when things go wrong and you can do nothing about it.
Boardroom upheaval is no stranger to me and I feel your hurt.
You are the fan and they are who you look to to put a side on the park. And they are failing.
Hopefully things change quickly but not so sure this season can be saved.

 

I've had a couple of periods where I worried that the apathy I was feeling would set in for good. The final 12 months of the Hill era and the first half of the season when Johnson was in charge. Of course, back then we had the great escape under Flitcroft and then the miracle of going from bottom to top 6 following a bit of investment in the likes of Hammill, Long, Fletcher, Brownhill. And players in their natural positions.

The difference this time is that I genuinely see little prospect of change, we've completely lost the identity and values that are so important to me as a supporter. There is no desire to battle, to entertain, we're slowly seeing quality decline and leave, its soulless and soul destroying.

I know it's easy to look back through rose tinted spectacles, and I've used this example before, but among the magical turnaround under Johnson and continued by Heckingbottom there was a stand out moment for me that kind of reignited the fire in my belly. It wasn't the superb football, spectacular goals, or any of that. It was at Bradford away in late January 2016, down by the left corner flag, George Williams up against Bradford's none too shabby winger Marcus Marshall. Blocks the first cross and ends up on his ar5e, back up and blocks the next effort, and then a third time conceding a corner. Over a few weeks you could feel the mentality change on the pitch and in the stands, this just brought it all together for me, the away end making noise for a defender doing his job as loudly as if we'd just popped in a 25 yarder. That evening convinced me that we were going to do something remarkable that season. As a supporter I'd been given hope, optimism, passion. None of which bring success without footballing ability.

But now there is nothing left there for me, the emptiest I've ever felt as a follower of Barnsley.

 

I wouldn't have thought so. Not when they all agreed where the 750k was to come from... according to khaled

 

Where's our BATTLING Barnsley gone ? Seen it on newspaper headlines over the years many times but will we see it again ? Certainly not this season that's for sure.

 

Well put. Defeats used to hurt. Yesterday, when we conceded, I just shrugged my shoulders and carried on with my day. Feel lost.

 

Excellent post. I believe there's quite a number of us feeling exactly the same way.

 

Can't get over the West stand debacle.

 

The absence from attending last year meant we couldn't enjoy (!) the relative success under Val.
We missed out big time and even though we could follow our team on tv, phone or computer, it somehow wasn't the same. We missed the physical experience of attending and I believe that instilled in us fans a "never mind" attitude, we won, we lost, we just missed out, but this then continued into this season where the apathy about attending became apathy about results.
We all found something else to do last season where we could switch on the tv, or whatever, at five to three, watch the game and then go and do what we were doing prior to that.
It was easy.
Now the mental approach has changed, we have seen our team's fortunes fade and our attitude has faded with them. We blame the owners for this due to their apparent carelessness. But we have lost the desire.

 

Do they chuff. The CEO has already said that the club doesn't even routinely acknowledge or read emails sent to them so why would they give a toss what anyone thinks?

 

I suspect you may be on to something with your comprehensive analysis of the situation.

 

Steady on Mr Badger. I thought you were going to end that with "I'm just going out. I may be some time."

 

Brilliant post mate. I remember that night at Bradford well. George Williams out of position at LB had a stormer. He just refused to be beaten, always loved his efforts in a red shirt. I see nothing now. No passion for the cause on or off the field.
So sad the apathy that surrounds the club right now.