OT: Help

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by tomaiba, Jun 29, 2022.

  1. tomaiba

    tomaiba Well-Known Member

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    Just currently overwhelmed with mental health, life issues, going through a breakup feeling insecure and all that I'm just reaching out to anyone to tell me anything. Advice is welcome but just telling me about your day works just as good.
     
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  2. Tarntyke

    Tarntyke Well-Known Member

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    Hi there, sorry to hear about your current predicament. Do you work? I ask this as I am now retired and in the last 12 months got a dog and I find taking him out for long walks is quite beneficial. It gives me time way from the house, I speak to other folk who I most probably would’ve never spoken to. I hope you keep safe and well as you can, you are already talking about it so that’s a great start.
     
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  3. Deafening Silence

    Deafening Silence Well-Known Member

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    Hi Tomaiba, very sorry to hear your life isn’t where you expected it to be today,l. I don’t feel qualified to give anyone advice, but drop me a pm if you want a barmy opinion.
     
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  4. TitusMagee

    TitusMagee Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear you are struggling. Reach out to friends, do things that make you feel happy and keep on with them for at least 15 mins until the motivation catches up. Look after yourself. Focus on things in the here and now- research mindfulness, rather than ruminating on the past or worrying about the future.

    Take care
     
  5. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

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    You and I have a history of disagreements on the BBS. However, this transcends difference of opinion. I am sorry to hear of your personal issues and hope you find peace and strength from those around you and on here.
    Good luck and all the best.
     
  6. ryc

    rycalshaw Well-Known Member

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    Hi Tomaiba' i recently bit the bullet and finally admitted to someone that i wasn't ok' which was a big step for me' i spoke to a mental health assessment lady over the phone and it really helped' someone that listened as i poured my heart out' someone that understood rather than judged' it was wonderful' i then got refferd to the stress pac team and again its been great' i wish i'd done it years ago instead of living under a very dark cloud and really not loving myself at all' i wish you all the very best and remember its ok not to be ok' all the best buddy...
     
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  7. Com

    Come on Tarn Well-Known Member

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    Fresh air helps me,go for a walk,I’ve had and still have my own battles,things that happened in the past still effect me now.I won’t take medication because I believe tablets only mask a problem but don’t solve a problem (everybody is unique).If today isn’t good I hope tomorrow is a better day.
     
  8. Loko the Tyke

    Loko the Tyke Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    You know where I am buddy. Happy to have that transatlantic chat any time you need it.

    Standard boring work day unfortunately here in North Yorkshire. Although currently taking a break for lunch to be sat in the kitchen wearing eye recovery patches and a luxury face mask - I kid you not.
     
  9. In4

    In4reds Well-Known Member

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    Sorry to hear that have you got a mate or maybe a family member you can talk to if not a charity like mind or even samaritans but please please talk to somebody mate a simple chat can sometimes but things in prospective. Good luck
     
  10. Red

    Red Rob Well-Known Member

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    Hey mate, would recommend a lot of the advice above. I've been seeing a psychologist recently which I've found incredibly helpful. Also of course any form of exercise and getting out the house helps. Finally talking to people is always great.
     
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  11. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    What I'd say is that there's always something around the corner. I thought my life was mapped out for me aged 57 and it wasn't going down a road that made me happy. Then fate stepped in, took me to another country and I've had the most fantastic five years of my life.
    Don't give up, things can always change.
     
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  12. Spr

    Sprotbrough Red Well-Known Member

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    I can't echo this any better, I'm in a particularly deep dark place at the moment and I personally find getting out in nature really helps me, I'm same regarding medication. I've thought these battles mostly on my own for as long as I can remember and I'm still here but I know one day I won't and it will take me but until that day comes I'll soldier on as I always do 1day at a time

    Good luck to all those fighting your own personal battles
     
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  13. Marlon

    Marlon Well-Known Member

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    Hey up Pal
    I know it may seem a long way off but there is light at the end of what probably seems a long tunnel.
    All I can advise is you seek as much support as you can muster and deal with from the area where you are based .
    There’ll be loads of moral support on the BBS if you need/want it most likely 24/7 .
    I know it’s hard but try to keep positive through some of the SH It that will most likely come your way and believe me there’s better times ahead .
    Best Wishes Tomaiba .
     
  14. Marc

    Marc Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Sorry to hear you’re going through it. We’ve all been through $hitty break ups, you’re definitely not alone. Talking is great, exercise is definitely recommended. Even just getting outside for half an hour. In terms of support groups, all the stuff mentioned already. Also try Andy’s Man Club. Brilliant set of people, there to talk to fellas who just might not have anyone else they can feel they talk to, without being judged.

    But definitely keep talking on here. This thread is open for ad long as you need it.
     
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  15. nezbfc

    nezbfc Well-Known Member

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    Make a very small list of things each day you want to focus on and achieve.

    DIY, self help stuff etc etc.

    Nothing too over the top, but enough to keep you focused or distracted and what is realistically achievable.

    Visit a mate, family member or something you haven't done or put off for a while.

    Do something for you, and if possible treat yourself to something now and again.

    In times like this, you definitely will find your true friends.

    And agree with everything written so far. But this very bbs has proven beyond doubt that ultimately we are one big family who rallies around when the chips are down.

    Best of luck, and keep talking on here
     
  16. arabian_ian

    arabian_ian Well-Known Member

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    Went through sh’t times myself 30 years ago (marriage break up and kids involved) but as mentioned there is light at the end of the tunnel but you just don’t see it atm.
    Stick in there and try to remain positive.
     
  17. Jack Tatty

    Jack Tatty Well-Known Member

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    You can pm .me if you wish to unload privately mate.


    BTW may i say well.done for taking a very big step..Asking for help and advice. Already a small win to you..

    This forum has helped me with my own issues and you will find many people will have your back.
     
  18. LiverpoolRed

    LiverpoolRed Well-Known Member

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    Been in this situation a few times - suffered with mental health issues for 30 years.. Get through life medicated up to the eyeballs, but it keeps me grounded. As others have pointed out, I'm open to Dm's if you need advice. Things like this are what makes this site different to other BFC fan sites- People are willing to help others in need. There's plenty of people on here who have DM'd me in times of trouble and I appreciate it - especially people I haven't met.
     
    Last edited: Jul 22, 2022
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  19. JamDrop

    JamDrop Well-Known Member

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    Hey tomaiba (which now I’ve written it out I realise I have been calling you tombola in my mind), well done for posting and asking for help. This place is amazing for having each other’s backs. I reckon most of us have had a turn and now we will have yours.

    In terms of advice, things always do get better. Be it a month, a year or a couple of years from now your life will be unrecognisable and you’ll look back at this and be proud that you got through it. Like someone said above, life can take the most random of turns in ways you could never predict. When you’re in a turn you don’t like, just remember that another one will be along soon.

    My work day has been productive and funny. Teenagers always have something to say that is absurd or hilarious (unless they are your own, apparently) so they’ve been entertaining and I’ve planned the induction sessions for year 7 next year.
     
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  20. Tyke_67

    Tyke_67 Well-Known Member

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    Hey Tomy,

    Hang in there buddy, it could be as simple as getting a hobby so that you can get out and talk to other people. That's what I did 3 years ago. I took up crown green bowling. Now I get to talk as much crap as I like to anyone that will listen. Always available for a PM anytime.

    P.S. I've just got back from watching the Elvis film. It was a bit weird really.
     
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