O/T Single again now.

Cheers. I just kept calmly saying I'm not talking about finances and i'm not agreeing to anything over the phone. When she realised I wasn't biting she didn't have as much to say.

 

Cheers. Another excellent response. I was thinking along the same lines. I've told her I won't agree to anything over the phone and it's going to mediation.

 

Best to agree things between yourselves if you can. If she's wanting to go out more that's a perfect opportunity for you to spend more time with the little un. Maybe suggest each writing down what you think access arrangements should be, allow some time to think about it and see if you can reach an agreement. For little ones it's considered best for access to be little but often

 

Cheers. I didn't want to rush anything on the phone or be seen to be backing down because her mother was sat chiming in in the background.

 

I don't think it would be in best taste going to Wembley so soon after what's happened. Glad I haven't already stumped up cash for ticket and travel although I was tempted at £30 for top tier. Just hope everyone has a good time and we get the result we all want.

 

All the best mate. Life La a ****** at times. Just try and make peace when the dust settles for the little ones sake.

 

Keep chin up mate

 

Your probably right but if you change your mind could be a good day to take your mind off stuff. I lost a close family member a few years ago (I know abit different to a break up) but didn't go to work or leave the house for days just sat there thinking. Worst thing I could have done. Try keep yourself busy and keep going for your lad. Like I said chin up.

 

My Dad's told me Laura will be moving on and getting on with her life. It won't stop her socialising. He told me to get myself off if I can get there. That's stumbling block. It steel feels in bad taste though and self indulgent.

 

I've got 3 tickets for sale, if u fancy going u can have one on me matey, see u in boxpark maybe?

 

Your dad is right, mate. Laura clearing isn't wasting no time, why should you? It's not a crime. Get yourself down, enjoy yourself, your escapism, forget about things for a couple of hours and be surrounded by people who love the thing you love, be a part of it. You never know when we'll be back playing in a playoff final (if recent history is anything to go by, probably 2-3 years! But you get my point!) especially against Wednesday. She hasn't stopped herself from doing anything, neither do you. As long as George is safe, which he will be, get yerself off. What a lovely offer from exiled too

 

Your dad's right it's not self indulgent you got to keep going and take your mind off stuff. Have a day out enjoy it.

 

This is why I say text only when it comes to agreeing anything. Cos she will push every button to get a bite. (Especially with someone I'm the background egging her on)

With text you can sit and ponder a measured response, and not answer directly in the heat of the moment and regret it.

The second a conversation starts escalating. End it. There and then.

 

Got impression she was using George to try and dictate terms and her mum as a battering ram.

 

Well done mate, it's not easy my best mate went through all this and I supporter him through it. It has gotten a lot better over time for him. He went from no access all the way upto every weekend and helping out in the week now. It's not the answer any of us want to hear but time does make a difference to us all.

 

Pm'd you mate .

 

Not been through a break up. So not the best to give advise. But amicable settlements, I do know, are sometimes a lot better than the use solicitors, Sometimes they push folk where they dont want to go. I do know that as fact. and sometimes are the cause of bitterness developing (Extra for them to sort out)
Do everything by the book. Someone I know. was paying his ex without thinking just handing over money every week with no record. . He thought she would be better off financially. Then she told the CSA she'd had nowt off him. He challenged all the way even writing to his MP.
CSA chasing back payments etc. .
He was allowed less money per child to his new partner than his ex in calculations.
Best of luck. Seen folk supposedly never going back to their partner. Reverse the decision even after just a short while.

 

Not sure what you mean by the last sentence. We're going through CSA for payment and mediation for access. We can't agree anything. As for reversing her decision. She doesn't want me mate and it's absolutely killing me all the thoughts of why and for how long.

 

Good - get yerself down and make sure to buy exile a drink. No reason to sit & dwell in your situation mate.

 

First of all SD, I'm sorry to read about your break up....been there wore the T-Shirt more than once I can tell you, and yes kids involved too.
The pain that you are feeling is unique to you only, you know what you are experiencing and what triggers, the pain and the anguish that you feel ...its odds on that certain memories situations and the emptiness you feel at times, will causes your emotion to be like a roller coaster ride.
Yes at times you will feel anger frustration highs lows and at times your heart and your head will be at logger heads with each other to the point you will feel like you are drowning on a wave of emotion
Breaking up is similar to the spin cycle on a washing machine....your thoughts just go round and round in your head and can drain the happiness out of you very quickly if you continuously allow them to consume you
The best bit of advice I was ever given
Cry yourself a river....build a bridge and then get over it as quickly as you can and without remorse or looking back . You can't change the past but you can your future
You might not believe it now but things will get better given time
It might sound harsh but speaking with experience I'd be reluctant to pay anything until you've taken legal advice....you can always put money aside to pay at a later date...why fund her social life until you know all the facts and where the coinage is being spent
Best of luck SD ...here should you feel the need to talk buddy