Half time 'entertainment'

Amazing. More ill conceived than our summer transfer activities. Two cars moving at Jon Russell speed in a race that wasnt timed. Top banter by the club.

 

They knew that one car wasn't working as well because it had to be carried off the pitch before kick off!

Tbf though, I love seeing all these 7 year olds absolutely loving their chance to score a goal at Oakwell!

 

I've got some suggestions for half time entertainment.

The masked winger: ex wingers (e.g. Simon Whaley and Gary Teale. Not David Cotterill because he's gone down the Matt Le Tissier route) sing under a mask for the Oakwell faithful to guess their identity.

Shukermarket Sweep: Chris Shuker presents an episode of supermarket sweep, beamed from Iceland at Monk Bretton, live to the Oakwell scoreboard.

Toby Tyke's storage wars: A series of shipping containers from local self store storage facilities are brought onto the pitch, and Toby Tyke auctions them off.

John Stones nonces: as it says on the tin. John Stones stones local pedophiles. The Ponte would love that.

Drederick Tatum: Callum Simpson fights all comers in the centre circle.

Monkey Tennis

 

If we don't do it, sky will.

 

Game of Thrones: Istvan Ferenczi hosts a lighthearted panel game where the key is to guess the player from their toilet habits. We initially see cut away shots of them on the bog from a host of angles in the style of Question of Sport, with keks round ankles.

The panel then examine the faecal contents which contain cryptic clues about the identity of the mystery player.

 

I recognise he's never played for us, but it would be remiss for me not to suggest Danny Shittu hosting it instead! Special guest!

 

Fun fact, I once helped Danny Shittu get his ppi back

 

But little did we know, that was the highlight of the rest of the afternoon…

 

Embarrassingly pathetic.

 

Is it really that embarrassing or pathetic? Or is it just a bit crap?

 

Quid game:
3 contestants, east, west and ponty, have 15 minutes to run to the pound shop of choice and return to the centre circle with a discounted item.
Biggest discount trumps fastest time.

Losers have to watch full Lincoln highlights. On loop. Forever.

 

Did he get much?

 

Half time entertainment should be Jon Flatman's price is right where supporters have to blindly guess the prices at the refreshment kiosks because bfc refuse to comply with basic trading law.

 

I was just surprised the cars weren't controlled by Callum Simpson and the fat bloke from rate my takeaway as per......

 

are you sure you talking about only the HT entertainment ;-)

 

He'd cancelled it early doors, so no.

 

I’d hoped it was some skulduggery on our behalf as we’d won the toss and chose to shoot the opposite way first half. I thought we’d done it on purpose so we could play the game with the little cars in front of Ponty to scuff the ground up or something. But no, it was just cr@p.