Alternative random Friday question

Have you ever had a ***** without doing a piss at the same time ?

 

how random indeed Mr N Mare.

i personally find a warm shower makes me want to pee?

hopethishelps

 

For what its worth the doctor reckons that emptying both my bowels and bladder at 6 oclock every morning without fail is a good sign at my age.

However he is alarmed and slightly worried

that i dont get out of bed until eight

hope this throws light if not sh. i te on the situation at hand.

 

that actually reminds me of my grandad... hes still having sex at 94...... which is handy as he lives at 82

 

Which reminds me of my dad.....goes in to a cafe and orders a coffee, he always says...I really shouldn't be drinking this with what I've got..when ask what he's got...he'll reply 20p

 

Eyup have I walked into Wheeltappers and Shunters Social Club.

Percy`s pies have come.

 

My gand mother bless her was 94 when she passed over in the local nursing home. To make her more comfortable and because her sight was not at its best given her age, the family clubed together and bought her a wide screen 3d dvd combined television.
my gran who had been , lets say ....a bit of a warm one in her younger days ....was in her element, given most of the residents were men.
infact she soon realized that the wide screen tv worked to her advantage, when football was on.
one old guy who she took a shine to, often would go and sit with her to watch the game, she allowed him to sit there watching the game the only stipulations being , that, a) he fetched the pies for half time and b) he sat with his hand down the front of her knickers throughout the game.

old jack an ex polce officer, was so happy to oblige and this went on for a few weeks, until one night, old jack knocked on her door.
and was refused entry

Stood there with pies in hand, he stated i know the rules ...pork pies for half time and my right hand down the front of your knickers, its been like that for weeks.

Yes shouted grandma but tonight my new friend charlie whos an ex miner is watching football with me tonight.

Why are you doing this shouted jack are his pies better than mine.

not in the least replied grandma.

Well snapped jack ....WHATS HE GOT THAT I HAVENT


VIBRATING WHITE FINGER SYNDROME scoffed grandma.

 

It's not possible for a human to do that is it?

 

Would say it is.....didnt yer mam always tell yer to wear clean pants and when you asked why,
she'd reply .....incase you get knocked down......

anybody who as been knocked darn will tell yer ......first thing you do is **** yer sen.

anybody doubting this information please read the disclaimer below....

i hold no responsability should you now deck clean pants walk in to traffic and wish to test the theory.

 

People may cack themselves when knocked down but they'll also do a little wee.

 

Mmmm interesting thought they say a fart only smells for for the benefit of the deaf, so they can enjoy it too. Suppose you might be on to something here ponty72, lol

One gets called a little sh1 t when im taking the p.1ss ....interesting subject....dont you think

 

Yes all the time

 

Dunno, but I allus let art a rip roaring fart after mi first piss of the day.

 

Lol. Me too.

 

lol you're special though thee Roy

 

That's life without Kidneys Nightmare owd lad lol!!