Me and our lass were having a right argument. She threw a bottle of fabric conditioner at me. It must have been Lenor because it was a bit too close for comfort
Our lass bet me £100 I couldn't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta.
Me too. Mrs Burgundy Red said all I think about is sport: football, cricket, rugby and anything else they show on Sky, no time for her she says, so I booked a nice corner table for two and things just got even worse. An hour and a half in and she’d only potted one red.
Similar happened to me. Ex wife left me coz she said I thought more about football than I did of her. I was gutted! We'd been married for almost 10 seasons.
Me and the wife had a blazing row in a restaurant last week. She ended up throwing her prawn cocktail at me............and that was just for starters!
Might have been in the same restaurant as me. Wife wanted a T-bone off the top shelf and her mother wanted a piece of sirloin from the same place. I told them the steaks were too high!
I cooked the ex a Chinese meal, used daffodil bulbs instead of water chestnuts to try and poison her. She's still int hospital but will be coming out int spring!
The UK's first '**** powered' bus has been involved in an accident in Bristol earlier today. The bus left the road and plummeted into the river Avon - luckily it was a floater.............
It's been a year today since we lost Grandad. I can remember how much we were all shocked, out of the blue, one minute he was there laughing and joking the next thing gone..... Took us 3 hours to find the lovely person and it's the last time we're taking him to the German Market with us!!
My Mrs says I'm addicted to Football Manager but in my defence Ive got Dani Alves, Pique, Ramos & Lahm
