CRAB CORNER

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022.

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  1. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    Welcome to StatisTYKE & Churtonred’s CRAB CORNER - the place to discuss all things crab!

    We set this thread up as last night’s crustacean discussion was in the ‘Russia invades Ukraine’ which didn’t seem reight. Also, we know that for years many posters have been wondering “why aren’t there more threads on seafood and that?”

    Recipes, how to dress a crab, tools needed, dead men’s fingers, - whether you’re a crab enthusiast or just starting out we want to hear from. you. We’re even interested in Stephen Dawson’s views on catching crabs

    And it’s not just crabs. From winkles to whelks, cod to coley, monkfish to moules, if it’s been swimming abart in the sea and you fancy cooking and eating it, here’s the plaice* to talk about it.

    Crack on.

    *See what I did there?
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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  2. Tyke_67

    Tyke_67 Well-Known Member

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    Did you hear about the crab that went to the gym? He pulled a mussel! :D:D:D
     
    Tyke_67, Mar 5, 2022
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  3. North Yorks Red

    North Yorks Red Well-Known Member

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    Goodo, thought it was just going to be a boring STD thread!

    Can't resist a peep in a rock pool though!
     
    North Yorks Red, Mar 5, 2022
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  4. Did

    Didcot Red Well-Known Member

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    Back in the day there were men who went round the local pubs selling sea food. They entered with a cry of "Cockles, mussels, Whelks and prawns" to which we would add "Albatross, gannet on a stick" (a Monty Python sketch).
     
    Didcot Red, Mar 5, 2022
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  5. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    Yes! The fishman. He was brilliant. After a few ales that was just what you needed all slathered in vinegar and white pepper. Folk go on about things being better in the old days but the fishman needs to make a comeback.
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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  6. Mr Badger

    Mr Badger Well-Known Member

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    The so-called crab sticks you buy in the shops ... never seen a crab in their lives !!
    Quite like the mussels in garlic sauce.
    Love crab and lobster but cannot be arsed preparing them myself.
    Am I on the right lines here?
     
    Mr Badger, Mar 5, 2022
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  7. Baz

    Bazza Well-Known Member

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    I went to the doctor .
    He told me I had crabs.
    He says go to the nearest supermarket purchase some castor sugar and rub it into the pubic region
    I says will it kill them doctor.
    He replies No but it will rot their fooooking teath
     
    Bazza, Mar 5, 2022
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  8. Baz

    Bazza Well-Known Member

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    I'll get mi coit
     
    Bazza, Mar 5, 2022
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  9. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    i never find anything in rock pools. Am I doing something wrong?
     
    churtonred, Mar 5, 2022
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  10. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    I've gone green.
    Much like some of the whelks I'd imagine. :confused:
     
    churtonred, Mar 5, 2022
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  11. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    Seen very small fish now and again. Very rare to see a crab - well one that's alive. I reckon the gulls give the pools a good going over as the tide goes out.
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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  12. Durkar Red

    Durkar Red Well-Known Member

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    Yes and don’t ask the guy who used to come in The King George if he’d got crabs
     
    Durkar Red, Mar 5, 2022
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  13. Sta

    Stahlrost Well-Known Member

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    How many testicles does an octopus have? Is it 7, 8, 14 or 16?
     
    Stahlrost, Mar 5, 2022
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  14. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    Looks like Statis has hauled me into Crab Corner so we'd best try and fillet.
    I had a delicious meal of river trout grilled and served with a creamy, garlicy sauce and pasta last week.
    I have had the occasional crab sandwich in Craster.
    and once stayed in a place in Brittany that was also a restaurant specialising in shellfish. They used to serve a dish which looked like a multi layer cake stand with every description of shellfish hanging off it and brought, instead of a knife and fork, what looked like a surgeon's operating kit. Discretion being the better part of valour I had the steak. :)
     
    churtonred, Mar 5, 2022
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  15. shenk1

    shenk1 Well-Known Member

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    0....my octopus is a lady :)



    That's a sentence I never thought I'd write.
     
    shenk1, Mar 5, 2022
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  16. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    Precisely. That just proves you are a worthy partner in this venture. Just imagine how much this thread is going to be worth in a few days time. We can flog it off to some media group like that bloke with wordle and make a fortune
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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  17. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    Ooh, I like that idea. I'm fed up of being small fry.
    I'd hate to think we've jumped the shark though.
     
    churtonred, Mar 5, 2022
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  18. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    Yes. There is the possibility we could be kippered.
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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  19. churtonred

    churtonred Well-Known Member

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    I'd like to move across my highly interesting fact too that if you have a bucket full of crabs then whenever one tries to escape the rest will drag it back in and probably kill it.
    It's like a John Wick movie. No one gets out alive.
     
    churtonred, Mar 5, 2022
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  20. StatisTYKE

    StatisTYKE Well-Known Member

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    *** BREAKING NEWS****

    Tonight, me and Mrs Statis are having Young’s Extra Large Fish Fillets in crispy beer batter. Now I don’t know what sort of fish it is and I don’t care. I’m in it for the batter. Only £2 for a pack of 2. Give ‘em a go.
     
    StatisTYKE, Mar 5, 2022
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