Does anyone have a copy of the e-mail that spoofs chain e-mails?

You know the sort, "Send this to 60 of your friends or you'll never have sex again" kind of e-mail?

It basically poked fun at the sort of people who are daft enough to proliferate the rubbish.

I had it once but lost it when my old hard drive died. I'd like to be able to send it onto a few people who are currently getting on my nerves by sending me such tripe even though they know my views.

It's just the text of it that I'm after.

Thanks in advance.

 

Is this it

if not it's still funny - got it sent to me a couple of days back

If you receive an email entitled

......"Bedtimes" ... delete it IMMEDIATELY.

Do not open it.

Apparently this one is pretty nasty.
It will not only erase everything on your
hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of
your computer.
It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.
It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR,
and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play.
It will program your phone auto dial to call only premium rate numbers.

This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.

IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING.

It will drink ALL your alcohol.

FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING??

It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are
expecting company.
It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine.
If the "Bedtimes" message opened in a Windows 95/98 environment,
it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in
dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will not only remove the
forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill
your skim milk with whole milk.

***
WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN.

***

And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds,
you'll fart so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight
out in front of you, sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest
you.

Send this warning to everyone!!!

 

Here's one

Just send a copy of this letter to five of your friends who are equally tired and discontented. Then bundle up your wife or girlfriend and send her to the man whose name appears at the top of this list, and add your name to the bottom.

When your turn comes, you will receive 16,255 women. One of them is bound to be better than the one you already have. At the time of writing this, a friend of mine had already received 184 women, 4 of whom were worth keeping.

Remember - This chain brings luck, One man’s cat died, and the next day he received a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader. You can be lucky too, so DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN! One man broke the chain and got his own wife back.

 

It's along those lines but not the one I was thinking of

The one I mean ends something along the lines of "Now send this onto 10, or is it 20 of your mates. Oh I don't know, just send it to someone or your rabbit will die, or something."

 

I know the one you mean

Can't find it though - not much use I know!

 

Have a look here

http://www.cs.rutgers.edu/~watrous/chain-letters.html

There are some spoof ones listed

 

This any good?

<p align="left">Make a wish!!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">Really, go on and make one!!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">wish something else!!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">Not that, you pervert!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">Is your finger getting tired yet?</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">STOP, DAMMIT!!!!</p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left"></p> <p align="left">Wasn't that fun? Hope you made a great wish. Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to certain number of people in the next 5 seconds, you will be raped by mad goat and then thrown off a high building into a pileof manure. It's true! Becuase, you know, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones!!! THIS one is TRUE!! Really!!! Here's how it goes.</p> <p align="left">Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.</p> <p align="left">Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter. You will be flamed.</p> <p align="left">5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter. You will be mail bombed.</p> <p align="left">10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you for sending them stupid chain letter. You will be hacked.</p> <p align="left">20 to 674,951.5 people: 20 to 674,951.5 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter. There will be a lynch mob out for you. You will be physically hacked... into chunky little kibbles.</p> <p align="left">Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!</p>

 

None of them are the one I was thinking of

But this one of Cazi's is a beauty. Those who are foolish enough to still pester me with such drivel are going to receive this! Thanks Cazi.