I can't watch this without changing the words in my head... Right...

Come in son. I'm Jerry St Claire, i'm the licencee. Philip isn't it?

That's right

I never forget a face.

Hemsy for hire and may I suggest that you remove the sign saying situation vacant and replace it with one saying situation full. I'm your man.

Right...good... Tell me Philip, have you had any previous experience of bar work?

Oh yes. You name it. Not only have I seen the film cocktail 6 times but I once was an inn keeper.

Really?

Ye

Where was that?

In Bethlehem. In St Peter and Pauls groundbreaking production of the nativity. Not only did I give Mary and Joseph room at the inn but I also offered them en suite with full English and a lovely view of Galilee.

Galilee... Those your references are they?

Yeah. "Dear Mr St Claire, Hemsy would be great behind a bar." That's from mi mum that one. My old wood work teacher Mr Haroon he err he says Philip will definitely end up behind a bar.

It say's 'bars' this, you've just crossed the 's' off.

Have they?

It says 'bars' this. And what made you apply for this job?

The DSS.

And er and why do you think I should give it to yer?

Because it'll be the DSS pay mi wages and it won't cost you a penny?

Really?

Ye

When can you start? Welcome to the Phoenix Hemsy lad. Welcome aboard.