Right, as we all know success in football = success with girls but what many don't know is that it's pretty much always been that way. In the days before polyester teams were arranged according to hair colour. The blacks and browns had massive squads and their consequent success meant they got to choose from the prettiest girls. Next came the blondes who had to choose from the sickly girls hence the weediness we now associate with blond men. Barely capable of scraping together a side the bottom of the table gingers were left with the ugly birds. There.
Fortunately, since the invention of kits we've been redressing the balance That's why I'm fantastic at football and my girlfriend's hot.