I'll start you off... 'What's it like to see a crowd, what's it like to see a crowd?' 'There's only one Paul Hayes, one Paul Hayes, there's only one Paul Hayes'. Let's be havin yer.
"Sh*t ground no fans" (or Sh*t ground sh*t fans....) "I've got a shed as big as this" "Where's yer striker gone" "£17, yer avin' a laugh" "Barber's Adagio for Strings" performed using a stick and a bit of scaffolding.