Light relief from the ticket debate..... anyone want a job in Guam??

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by fired, Sep 28, 2009.

  1. fir

    fired Administrator Staff Member Admin

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2007
    Messages:
    16,778
    Likes Received:
    13,052
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Style:
    Barnsley (full width)
    Proof That The World Is Nuts!

    In Lebanon , men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
    (Like THAT makes sense.)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Bahrain , a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
    (Do they look different reversed?)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
    (A brick?)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
    (Much worse than 'going blind!')
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
    (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Hong Kong , a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
    The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
    (Ah! Justice!)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool , England - but only in tropical fish stores.
    (But of course!)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Cali , Colombia , a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
    (Makes one shudder at the thought.)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

    In Santa Cruz , Bolivia , it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
    (I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Maryland , USA it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.'
    (Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam !)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
    (Who volunteers for these tests?)
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
     
    fired, Sep 28, 2009
    #1
  2. JLWBigLil

    JLWBigLil Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2005
    Messages:
    50,946
    Likes Received:
    33,178
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Style:
    Barnsley (full width)
    You're a little tinker at times.
     
    JLWBigLil, Sep 28, 2009
    #2
  3. Dodworth Red

    Dodworth Red New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    Messages:
    1,556
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Doduth
    Home Page:
    You have started something now... :D

    21 Little Known Facts About The Human Body...

    A human being loses an average of 40 to 100 strands of hair a day.

    A cough releases an explosive charge of air that moves at speeds up to 60 mph.

    Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

    A fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months.

    A sneeze can exceed the speed of 100 mph.

    Every person has a unique tongue print.

    According to German researchers, the risk of heart attack is higher on Monday than any other day of the week.

    After spending hours working at a computer display, look at a blank piece of white paper. It will probably appear pink.

    An average human drinks about 16,000 gallons of water in a lifetime.

    A fingernail or toenail takes about 6 months to grow from base to tip.

    An average human scalp has 100,000 hairs.

    It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown.

    Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies.

    Beards are the fastest growing hairs on the human body. If the average man never trimmed his beard, it would grow to nearly 30 feet long in his lifetime.

    By age sixty, most people have lost half of their taste buds. By the time you turn 70, your heart will have beat some two-and-a-half billion times (figuring on an average of 70 beats per minute.)

    Each square inch of human skin consists of twenty feet of blood vessels.

    Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.

    Every person has a unique tongue print.

    The largest organ in the human body is the skin.

    Every square inch of the human body has an average of 32 million bacteria on it.

    Fingernails grow faster than toenails.

    Humans shed about 600,000 particles of skin every hour - about 1.5 pounds a year. By 70 years of age, an average person will have lost 105 pounds of skin.
     
    Dodworth Red, Sep 28, 2009
    #3
  4. Dodworth Red

    Dodworth Red New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    Messages:
    1,556
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Doduth
    Home Page:
    You have started something now... :D

    21 Little Known Facts About The Human Body...

    A human being loses an average of 40 to 100 strands of hair a day.

    A cough releases an explosive charge of air that moves at speeds up to 60 mph.

    Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

    A fetus acquires fingerprints at the age of three months.

    A sneeze can exceed the speed of 100 mph.

    Every person has a unique tongue print.

    According to German researchers, the risk of heart attack is higher on Monday than any other day of the week.

    After spending hours working at a computer display, look at a blank piece of white paper. It will probably appear pink.

    An average human drinks about 16,000 gallons of water in a lifetime.

    A fingernail or toenail takes about 6 months to grow from base to tip.

    An average human scalp has 100,000 hairs.

    It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown.

    Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies.

    Beards are the fastest growing hairs on the human body. If the average man never trimmed his beard, it would grow to nearly 30 feet long in his lifetime.

    By age sixty, most people have lost half of their taste buds. By the time you turn 70, your heart will have beat some two-and-a-half billion times (figuring on an average of 70 beats per minute.)

    Each square inch of human skin consists of twenty feet of blood vessels.

    Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.

    Every person has a unique tongue print.

    The largest organ in the human body is the skin.

    Every square inch of the human body has an average of 32 million bacteria on it.

    Fingernails grow faster than toenails.

    Humans shed about 600,000 particles of skin every hour - about 1.5 pounds a year. By 70 years of age, an average person will have lost 105 pounds of skin.


    [​IMG]
    <a href="http://www.vidiLife.com/?tc=1098080"> Keep your hands where I can see them..
     
    Dodworth Red, Sep 28, 2009
    #4
  5. chester

    chester New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2009
    Messages:
    1,522
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    Gas Engineer
    Location:
    Reight art in the front
    Home Page:
    wat about...a Hackney Carriage (Taxi) may park anywhere as long as it is carrying a bail of hay and water to feed and water the horse!! still going today!!!
     
    chester, Sep 28, 2009
    #5
  6. fir

    fired Administrator Staff Member Admin

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2007
    Messages:
    16,778
    Likes Received:
    13,052
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Style:
    Barnsley (full width)
    Do you have any stats on

    .. what happens if a woman doesn't trim her beard .... how long it would be?? :)
     
    fired, Sep 28, 2009
    #6
  7. Dodworth Red

    Dodworth Red New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    Messages:
    1,556
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Doduth
    Home Page:
    Is it still legal to pi** on the rear near side of your car.

    without prosecution :)

    [​IMG]
    <a href="http://www.vidiLife.com/?tc=1098080"> Keep your hands where I can see them..
     
    Dodworth Red, Sep 28, 2009
    #7
  8. chester

    chester New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2009
    Messages:
    1,522
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    Gas Engineer
    Location:
    Reight art in the front
    Home Page:
    RE: Is it still legal to pi** on the rear near side of your car.

    yes, and a coach driver can pee on his front tyre next to the door with passengers on
     
    chester, Sep 28, 2009
    #8
  9. Dodworth Red

    Dodworth Red New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    Messages:
    1,556
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Doduth
    Home Page:
    And I wanted to believe it...

    The Virgin Rumor
    Many have asked this over and over but it's true that deflowering Guam virgins as a job is only a myth. The so-called "Guam law" that forbids women to marry as virgins is just a rumor that was made up in an issue of the Marie Claire some nine years ago. To this day, there is no proof that such bizarre law exists in Guam. We hope this small random article from Project Guam can correct this misunderstanding with the following three reasons to prove that there is no such law.

    First reason... Guam is a predominant Catholic society. (Does that give it away?)


    Second... Prostitution (trading sex for goods/money) is illegal in Guam, USA... So, having a job that pays you to have sex with a virgin is illegal.


    Finally... Guam held a peaceful protest and a massive boycott against the Marie Claire magazine, which were burned in barbeque pits!


    It is amazing how one bizarre and untrue article from a well known magazine can spread to other magazines and then to the internet.

    Seems, if you repeat a lie often enough, it eventually becomes truth and it came to a point where political leaders had to intervene to correct this rumor. Madelline Bordallo, the Lt. Governor at the time took charge of holding a women's rights rally and described the Guam virgin article as "degrading and clearly written in ignorance". Some of the writers must have a damn good imagination to select Guam and make up such a bizarre story!




    [​IMG]
     
    Dodworth Red, Sep 28, 2009
    #9
  10. fir

    fired Administrator Staff Member Admin

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2007
    Messages:
    16,778
    Likes Received:
    13,052
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Style:
    Barnsley (full width)
    I love the fact

    that you (or someone) bothered to check it out.
    :)
     
    fired, Sep 28, 2009
    #10
  11. M1 Tyke

    M1 Tyke New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2005
    Messages:
    1,926
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Occupation:
    The only Tory in the village
    Location:
    Somewhere between Dirty Leeds and That London
    Home Page:
    I must tell our lass that next time she gets caught short nt
     
    M1 Tyke, Sep 28, 2009
    #11
  12. Plankton Pete

    Plankton Pete Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2005
    Messages:
    9,297
    Likes Received:
    4,035
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    In hiding from the lynch mob
    Home Page:
    Style:
    Barnsley (full width)
    Do the passengers have to be...

    ..on the door whilst he's pissing and as'passengers' as writtenisplural, how many have to be on the door to make it legal? Does on a single passenger hanging on the door mean it becomes illegal? Out of interest, like.</p>
     
    Plankton Pete, Sep 28, 2009
    #12

Share This Page