Just got this in an e-mail, you may have seen it before but for those who haven't.............. >>>>This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed >>>>from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to >>>>say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing >>>>the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause". >>>>Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now >>>>I know why they >>>>record these conversations!): >>>> >>>>Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?" >>>>Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." >>>>Operator: "What sort of trouble?" >>>>Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words >>>>went away." >>>>Operator: "Went away?" >>>>Caller: "They disappeared." >>>>Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?" >>>>Caller: "Nothing." >>>>Operator: "Nothing?" >>>>Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type." >>>>Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" >>>>Caller: "How do I tell?" >>>>Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" >>>>Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?" >>>>Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?" >>>>Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I >>>>type." >>>>Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" >>>>Caller: "What's a monitor?" >>>>Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. >>>>Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?" >>>>Caller: "I don't know." >>>>Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the >>>>power cord goes into it. Can you see that?" >>>>Caller: "Yes, I think so." >>>>Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's >>>>plugged into the wall. >>>>Caller: "Yes, it is." >>>>Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there >>>>were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?" >>>>Caller: "No." >>>>Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find >>>>the other cable." >>>>Caller: "Okay, here it is." >>>>Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into >>>>the back of your computer." >>>>Caller: "I can't reach." >>>>Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?" >>>>Caller: "No." >>>> >>>>Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way >>>>over?" >>>>Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's >>>>because it's dark." >>>>Operator: "Dark?" >>>>Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is >>>>coming in from the window. >>>>" Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then." >>>>Caller: "I can't." >>>>Operator: "No? Why not?" >>>>Caller: "Because there's a power failure." >>>>Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it >>>>licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff >>>>your computer came in?" >>>>Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." >>>>Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just >>>>like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought >>>>it from." >>>>Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?" >>>>Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is." >>>>Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?" >>>>Operator: "Tell them you're too f*%ing stupid to own a computer!!!"