Pengiun walks in to a bar...

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006.

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  1. Terry Nutkins

    Terry Nutkins Well-Known Member

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    and says to the Barman &quot;Ay Up mate have you seen my dad?&quot;</p>

    Barman says, &quot;I don't know mate whats he look like?&quot;</p>

    Bedum Tish.</p>

    I just thought I'd get in on the act.</p>
     
    Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006
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  2. Terry Nutkins

    Terry Nutkins Well-Known Member

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    Lobster walks into a bar...

    and ask the barman for a pint of lager.</p>

    &quot;No sorry tha barred&quot;</p>

    &quot;Barred???&quot; asks the lobster</p>

    &quot;Ay tha barred&quot;</p>

    &quot;Why??&quot; questions the crustacean</p>

    &quot;Too much of that.......&quot;</p>



    He he Visual jokes never have the same effect on Message boards....!</p>
     
    Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006
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  3. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Man walks into a bar...

    ouch!
     
    Guest, Jul 14, 2006
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  4. Terry Nutkins

    Terry Nutkins Well-Known Member

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    A Gorilla walks into a bar...

    and asks the Barman for a pint of cider.</p>

    To which the barman duely pours him a pint of cheap Scrumpy. Sensing an opportunity to earn some extra cash the barman then asks for a fiver for the pint.</p>

    The gorilla then takes out a fresh fiver from his 'pocket' and pays the eager barman.</p>

    5 minutes pass and the barman's noseyness gets the better of him and says to the gorilla, &quot; We don't get many of your type in here?&quot;</p>

    Gorilla then says, &quot;I'm not suprised at five pound a pint!!&quot;</p>
     
    Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006
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  5. tyk

    tyketalker New Member

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    dyslexic walks into a bra

    old ones aren't always the best....
     
    tyketalker, Jul 14, 2006
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  6. stevie

    stevie New Member

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    RE: Man walks into a bar...

    neer mind the jokes .. get back to windy ....(nodding2fingers)
     
    stevie, Jul 14, 2006
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  7. Gaz

    Gaz Active Member

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    This onomatopoeia walks into a baa...
     
    Gaz, Jul 14, 2006
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  8. tyk

    tyketalker New Member

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    boo hiss...

    rubbish..   </p>



    hehe.. good night last night!?</p>
     
    tyketalker, Jul 14, 2006
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  9. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Girl walks into a bar

    says to the barman 'Can I have a double entendre'

    So he gave her one.
     
    Guest, Jul 14, 2006
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  10. Gaz

    Gaz Active Member

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    Called off.

    Mate's Dad taken to hospital on last legs. Didn't feel much like going after that.
     
    Gaz, Jul 14, 2006
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  11. tyk

    tyketalker New Member

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    oh dear...

    it looked good as well.</p>

    I still haven't packed properly... hope I've rememberd all I need or  I'm up sh*t creek in a lot of ways!</p>

    [​IMG]</p>
     
    tyketalker, Jul 14, 2006
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  12. Gaz

    Gaz Active Member

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    Enjoy.

    Ross Noble, Nottingham, August.

    That's the next invite.
     
    Gaz, Jul 14, 2006
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  13. Terry Nutkins

    Terry Nutkins Well-Known Member

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    Oy will you do you chatting off of the joke thread unless

    Tha brings **** jokes of the highest order wi thi...</p>



    Bloody old fogies</p>
     
    Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006
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  14. tyk

    tyketalker New Member

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    hes playing Sheffield too isn't he?!

    anyway, I'm off... nice long drive up to Scotland for me.</p>

    in this heat.</p>

    in my mother's skoda.</p>

    great stuff.</p>

    ttfn.</p>
     
    tyketalker, Jul 14, 2006
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  15. Gaz

    Gaz Active Member

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    Two impatient expressions walk into a bah.
     
    Gaz, Jul 14, 2006
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  16. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Man walks into a bar

    carrying two jump leads. The barman says, 'You can come in, but don't start anything!'
     
    Guest, Jul 14, 2006
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  17. Thrappo Tyke

    Thrappo Tyke Well-Known Member

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    Are there tickets available still?.

    I didnt even realise he was touring...still..mitchell and webb in october
     
    Thrappo Tyke, Jul 14, 2006
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  18. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Man walks into a bar

    with a piece of tarmac under his arm and says, 'A beer please, and one for the road'.
     
    Guest, Jul 14, 2006
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  19. Terry Nutkins

    Terry Nutkins Well-Known Member

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    Jesus...

    Bingley's taken it to a whole new level of shittness.</p>



    I need to raise my game.</p>
     
    Terry Nutkins, Jul 14, 2006
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  20. Gue

    Guest Guest

    A woodworm walks into a bar

    and says 'Is the bartender here?'
     
    Guest, Jul 14, 2006
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