I have offered R.Tiverton 50p if he will help clear the earwigs, spiders, woodlice and other nasty beasts from our shed. He cannot wait to start so he hurries up the path. R.Tiverton : It will keep my mind off tonight's match and the terrible deed I have done in ignoring Rueben Noble-Lazarus's skills at a time when the club faces the threat of relegation. I feel so bad about that. R.Tiverton : Hey ! I can hear laughing and a bit of a growly giggling. Those creepy crawlies are making a lot of noise in there ! And I can smell chocloate. Why do you keep chocolate in your shed ? I open the door and guess what................... R.Tiverton : Hooray ! Slebitty Dad we've found you at last. Did that wicked tiger kidnap you ? Me : R.Tivvy, that's Dean Windass your father has been led astray, not kidnapped. I thought I'd banished Dean Windass from this house long ago. R.Tiverton : No, no ! It is a real kidnap, look at all the food that the tiger has been force feeding Slebitty Dad with. It's cruel ! Personally I can see through Monkey and his antics so I grab him by the scruff of his neck and take him indoors. Just what does he think he's playing at on such an important day for Barnsley Football Club as this ?
"ignoring Rueben Noble-Lazarus's skills at a time when the club face relegation" You aren't on your own there. I think we are all guilty of that and should be ashamed of ourselves.
Well a big thank you to the people who contributed to my ransom. I am very sorry if I have misled anyone about the nature of my disappearance. Dean is a difficult bloke to say no to. What if we'd had him playing for us this season ? Sigh. Too many what ifs.
Indeed. </p> I'm so busy shouting "Davey Out!" I'm driving our best young prospects out to other clubs. What a complete batsard.</p>
nah then - there is some bone picking to do first of all monkey I'm not happy that you skanked some money out of me but as it was for a good cause I'm going to let you off this time. secondly - somebody is spending too much of their time on here and crafting clever little stories together. I'm looking out for the next instalment where ronni does hot desking! thirdly - CM you're supposed to be in training for the marathon or something</p> fourthly - and the most worrying one of all, is that I went for my tickets for the plymouth game yesterday and there sat on the desk in the ticket office is a <strike>life</strike> giant size celebrity monkey in full reds kit. What's happening there then? Have BFC finally recognised your celebrity status? Or is someone cashing in on your popularity? It could always be a cheap attempt at a smoke screen to deflect away from the reds current predicament, I suppose. </p>
RE: nah then - there is some bone picking to do 1. Thank you for your kind donation Susie. I have learnt I have about three fans who care about me. 2. Not seen Ronni since I came back. R.Tivvy is being evasive about where she is. 3. Weeks to go before marathon. Don't want to wear mi legs out. 4. Well bloody hell, it's got a reds kit on now has it ? My agent saw it once ( getting hillsb tickets ) and it had a blue scarf on then ! It is defo a smokescreen, it will be training with Man u next week if we don't worship it.