R.Tiverton Returns Home

The doorbell rings. Monkey runs to see if it is the postman delivering his April copy of 'Hot Monkey Babes', last month there was trouble when Maureen got to the door first. But no ! It is Steven Foster, he has brought R.Tiverton home.



Fozzie : Here's your little lad Monkey. You really ought to look after him properly. I've been too busy training to bring him home before now.

Monkey : Thank you Mr.Foster. We were glad to see you aren't out for the rest of the season like it said on the internet.

Fozzie : Monkey, there is a lot of nonsense on the internet. You should know that !





Monkey : Would you like to come in for some cupasoup and toastie soldiers ?

Fozzie : No thank you, I'd better get back to training. Bye R.Tiverton, nice meeting you.

R.Tiverton : Bye Fozzie !




We crowd round R.Tiverton eager to hear what he's been up to.

R.Tiverton : Well I was given special permission to watch Barnsley training and it was good fun.





R.Tiverton : First they do this thing where Miffy goes and hides in all the long grass and all the other players have to hoof the ball really really high up in the air to him to see if it lands anywhere near him.

Monkey : And did it work ? Were they any good at it ?

R.Tiverton : Not really.



R.Tiverton : Than Kozzie said let's play the feather game and I said what is that and he says they all get a feather and take it in turns to knock Anderson down with it. So I reminded him poor Anderson wasn't there and he said oh yes of course, sorry Anderson.

Monkey : Then what ?



R.Tiverton : Well a man with a bald head said I had to see him in his office so I waited in a queue for a long time then I went in. He said he had heard me shouting at Kevin Blackwell and calling him a deedar and that it was very rude. He said if I did it again he would confiscate my season ticket so I told him I don't actually have one and that we all go in with just one ticket and that we hide in pockets and bags. And he said 'Oh do you now that is very interesting' and what are your names ? So I told him all about you and he said erm yes I have just had a man in here talking about monkeys and I thought he was quite mad. I looked at the floor and there was a lot of birdseed. And then he gave me this voucher to spend in the club shop and told me I was cute.

 

Hillarious.. again

 

Do they sell anything that only costs 10p ? Poor lad is so excited now about going to spend it I fear he will be disappointed.

 

The training bit

FACTFUNNY

 

Great. Thanks nt

 

Would the 10p voucher buy you a bald head like the man in the office... you would look very funny with one of those..

 

I'm pissin misen...................that said, at 90 years old and being looked after in a nursing home it happens all the time. Keep up the goodwork Monkey, Christmas cracker jokes could be your next big thing.

 

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz