Referee's Assessor's Report For Yesterday

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by orsenkaht, Sep 30, 2012.

  1. orsenkaht

    orsenkaht Well-Known Member

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    Can't reveal how I have access to this, but the official assessor's report discloses nothing untoward in Trevor Kettle's handling of yesterday's game.

    "Mr Kettle indicated to me prior to the match that he felt he’d been in hot water with the Barnsley fans previously. I advised him to put this out of his mind. The match began in competitive fashion, with the Ipswich midfield in their element. There was an early goal for Ipswich, following which the home team began to get up a head of steam. Mr Kettle disallowed a goal for the home side, following which there were protests, but he managed to keep the lid on things.

    In the second half things began to come to the brew, and Mr Kettle cautioned five players. As Barnsley gained the ascendancy, Mr Kettle had cause to scald several members of the away team. Three penalty claims were made by the Barnsley players, but Mr Kettle declined them, which meant he was not the darjeeling of the crowd. Barnsley gained a late goal however, following which the match came to the boil. Injuries and substitutions threw more factors into the pot. However, Mr Kettle maintained control of the game, which tead the match up for a good finish."

    Not sure whether this will cause some posters to reassess Mr Kettle's performance yesterday.
     
    orsenkaht, Sep 30, 2012
    #1
  2. Bossman

    Bossman Well-Known Member

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    You got some connections there orsen you little tinker
     
    Bossman, Sep 30, 2012
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  3. mrx

    mrx Banned Idiot

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    written by T.M.
     
    mrx, Sep 30, 2012
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  4. alf

    alf1887 Active Member

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    alf1887, Sep 30, 2012
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  5. wak

    wakeyred Well-Known Member

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    (Pepper)mint WUM!
     
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2012
    wakeyred, Sep 30, 2012
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  6. Jay

    Jay Well-Known Member

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    He likes a play on words this assessor of yours

    hot water, element, head of steam, keep the lid on things, brew, darjeeling, boil, pot, tead.

    You met him over a cup of tea I'm guessing.
     
    Jay, Sep 30, 2012
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  7. Sim

    Simon De Montforte Well-Known Member

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    Simon De Montforte, Sep 30, 2012
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  8. Mike Lowry

    Mike Lowry Well-Known Member

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    A tepid interpretation of Kettle's insipid display, I'd say.

    .
     
    Mike Lowry, Sep 30, 2012
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  9. tingleytyke

    tingleytyke Well-Known Member

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    Was the assessor Russell Hobbs?
     
    tingleytyke, Sep 30, 2012
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  10. Micky Finn

    Micky Finn Well-Known Member

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    Re: He likes a play on words this assessor of yours



    And 'scald'. That's either a typo or he's better than we thought.
     
    Micky Finn, Sep 30, 2012
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  11. jedstar

    jedstar Well-Known Member

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    Re: He likes a play on words this assessor of yours

    Not being funny Orsen but is that legit? I wouldn't expect a referee's report to be written like that, it's more like a brief match report?
     
    jedstar, Sep 30, 2012
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  12. Mr C

    Mr C Well-Known Member

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    Re: He likes a play on words this assessor of yours

    That is really funny, a Sunday afternoon well spent.
     
    Mr C, Sep 30, 2012
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  13. Bossman

    Bossman Well-Known Member

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    The fa will be steaming if it turns out to be true, you could end up in hot water for this orsen
     
    Bossman, Sep 30, 2012
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  14. jedstar

    jedstar Well-Known Member

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    On re-reading I see what you did there...very good
     
    jedstar, Sep 30, 2012
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  15. troff

    troff Well-Known Member

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    I think a few ought to wake up and smell the coffee
     
    troff, Sep 30, 2012
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  16. Farnham_Red

    Farnham_Red Administrator Staff Member Admin

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    Very good :)
     
    Farnham_Red, Oct 1, 2012
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  17. Nor

    NorthernDreamer Well-Known Member

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    Total fiction, get a life!
     
    NorthernDreamer, Oct 1, 2012
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  18. Sim

    Simon De Montforte Well-Known Member

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    Woooosh! The names Kettle, it's supposed to be funny. If you give people 10 puns, at leats one should be understood although in your case - no pun in ten did. :biggrin:
     
    Simon De Montforte, Oct 1, 2012
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  19. Red

    Red Rain Well-Known Member

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    Would it have been offensive if I had called the referee Black. My name isn't Potts BTW.
     
    Red Rain, Oct 1, 2012
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