Seen something similar to this on here before but here goes...

Discussion in 'Bulletin Board ARCHIVE' started by Another Bubble, Nov 19, 2005.

  1. Ano

    Another Bubble New Member

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    A quick, easy-to-understand guide to political ideologies:

    FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

    FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.

    PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbours help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

    APPLIED COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

    PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbours decide who gets the milk.

    REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbours pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

    AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate". The cow sues you for breach of contract.

    EUROPEAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. After that it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

    CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

    HONG KONG CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly-listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the right to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because of bad feng shui.

    LESBIANISM: You have two cows. They get married and adopt a veal calf

    TOTALITARIANISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

    POLITICAL CORRECTNESS: You are associated with (the concept of 'ownership' is a symbol of the phallocentric, warmongering, intolerant past) two differently aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of nonspecified gender.

    COUNTERCULTURE: Wow, dude, there's like ... these two cows, man. You have *got* to have some of this milk.

    SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
     
  2. Gue

    Guest Guest

    Laughing a lot at the surrealism one.

    Very good. :pff
     
  3. Amos

    Amos New Member

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    What 'appens if thas got two Penguins?

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  4. Gue

    Guest Guest

    describes PC in its best way

    talking B*ll*cks which is exactly what political correctness is.
     
  5. EastStander

    EastStander Active Member

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    RE: describes PC in its best way

    The term "political correctness" is B*ll*cks and one used by the media to term anything they don't agree with.
     

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