Taffy's Barnsley Preview................

<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td valign="top"><span class="t7">Whippets and Puddings - It's Yorkshire Time Again</span>

By Phil Sumbler
Date: 2/3/2006

Huddersfield - Lost. Doncaster - Lost. Rotherham - Drew. Bradford - Drew. Hardly a great record in Yorkshire this season, thank god it's the last trip (barring play offs) - Are you watching Dickie Bird? Yup, it's Barnsley - a small town in nowhere!</td></tr></tbody></table><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td>
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<table id="AutoNumber1" style="BORDER-COLLAPSE: collapse" bordercolor="#111111" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td width="2%"></td><td width="96%" bgcolor="#ffffff"><table id="AutoNumber6" style="BORDER-COLLAPSE: collapse" bordercolor="#111111" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0"><tbody><tr><td width="2%"></td><td width="96%"><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="6">A</font><font face="Tahoma" size="2">fter the 'excitement' of Huddersfield fans as they 'came from behind' to snatch a point from us it's back to normality and the straight town of Barnsley this weekend as we look to re-rail the promotion train.</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">I'm told that Barnsley is a good old fashioned straight Yorkshire town where the men are men and the whippets are worried which is good news for everyone bar of course the slower whippets.    </font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">What is highly amusing is that no doubt the Swans faithful in attendance on Saturday will receive some chant of sheep s*****r or equivalent.   Well at this time it will be only polite to retort that Barnsley's famous chop, which is served all around the world is a 3lb Mutton Chop.    Indeed, this is even served to royalty so next time you see Queenie in Cardiff maybe you are entitled to sing &quot;We sh*g em you eat em&quot;   Just make sure you never eat a Whippet though!</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">Barnsley's official web site also tells us that within a 5 mile radius they have 3 nightclubs and 38 bars and it is impossible to visit them all in one night.    They are probably right but why would anyone want to spend a night in Barnsley anyway?   Why?</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">Local celebrities from Barnsley include the legends that are Dickie Bird and Michael Parkinson.    Dickie won't be at the game on Saturday - he has flu (think about it) and the reason being it's been Parky in Barnsley recently.   Boom Boom, it's the way I tell 'em.  Also included in celebrity gallery are Cricketer come girly dancer Darren Gough, Pop Idol failed star Sam Nixon and Sunderland manager Mick McCarthy.   </font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">All of that does lead to Ant O'Connell building his commentary for Saturday and he is, at the time of writing, preparing a hysterical end, in case we need it of &quot;Dickie Bird, Dazza Gough, Arthur Scargill, Sam Nixon, Mick McCarthy your boys took one hell of a beating&quot; - mind you I am sure Mick McCarthy is used to that by now!</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">And so onto the team news.    Kevin 'One, Two, Push a Daisy' Austin joins the casualty list for the Swans meaning a recall for KOL probably in the back line whilst up front the noises suggest that Jackett is backing Fallon to score his first goal - possibly a starter alongside LT10?  In midfield the speculation is whether El Captino will return - my suspicion is no but time will tell.</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">For Barnsley, left winger/Striker Arthur Scargill isn't playing but they will have 11 players on the pitch for the game as they look build on their leapfrogging us in the play off positions.    &quot;I'll leap over you&quot; thats what they said to the whippet you know.</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">And so we draw to a close - a safe trip for those travelling on the weekend and the usual health warning while you are up there that you just have pudding with your beef in Yorkshire.</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">Safe one lads - JACK ARMY!</font></p><p align="justify"><font face="Tahoma" size="2">PS - Love Ya Scousers</font></p></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></p></td></tr></tbody></table>

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Good lord.

 

"Dickie Bird....has the flu. (Think about it)"

Ooh, me sides.

 

Kinell.

Did Bobby Davro write that?

 

Leapfrog them?

Sorry, already done that.

 

Lets hope for a bout of bird flu for the swans and a few leeks in their defence

<p align="left">Welsh Cnuts</p>

 

 How do they know who I am?