Talking of Formalities (ref Prince of Risborough Post)

Good manners cost nothing as they say. I believe table manners still have a place in today's society.

 

I'm as rough as a bears ar5e, but I'm a stickler for table manners, in fact manners in general, we brought our son up with good manners and we always got comments from his teachers and dinner ladies about his manners, ( he's 38 now ), thankfully he's bringing his 7 year old son up the same way and once again history repeats itself with comments from teachers etc. So no, it's not stuffy nonsense, one of my pet hates is to see young children eating with their mouths open, disgusting and their parents should be ashamed of themselves for allowing it. I could rant for ages on this one. As a young teenager I worked for a guy on the old fish market and his motto was that good manners and civility cost nothing but are worth a fortune.

 

I agree. Good manners are important and are something that are slowly slipping away in today's world. There's a difference between good manners and stuffy formalities for the sake of them though. Table manners fall into the good manners category for me, but there are plenty of other formalities, or traditions for want of a better word, that are just there for the higher classes to look down on the rest of us. I'm afraid black tie and lounge suits, etc fall into this category. You can look smart without dressing up so ridiculously.

The worst part of that formal world though are the people from the same background as ourselves who use it as a stick to beat people with. I'm thinking of waiters, particularly, but also people like commissionaires, club officials, etc. a d don't even get me started on the 'proper' way to greet members of the aristocracy...

I just think it's possible to be polite and good mannered without all that nonsense, but unfortunately, I've found that for all their adherence to traditions and rules, the higher up the food chain you are the less inclined you are to give consideration to actual good manners.

 

Yep, knife and fork placed together on a well licked plate is reassurance enough that I`ve finished.

Graaavyyy.

 

With you on all of that! The trouble is though that table manners and dress codes are sliding inexorably into history. It will take a long time but, eventually, all of that will be gone. I think that's a shame but everyone has their own opinions on it.

I hate all that "Downton Abbey" stuff but only because of the shameful way that the below stairs staff would have been treated in most cases. This kind of attitude is still around unfortunately, but less so nowadays I think

 

I don't know if it's the same in the UK nowadays, but over here, it appalls me that 99% of people don't know how to use a knife and fork properly, so even in a formal setting I see this ridiculous switching of cutlery between bites. It goes like this: fork in left hand, knife in right hand and food is cut into a bite-size piece. Then, knife is set down and fork is swapped into the right hand for scooping. Eating begins. 5 seconds later it starts all over again. What happened to keeping your fork in your left hand and using it to put the food in your mouth? Does my head in.

 

Yep. All that and nobody leaves the table until everyone else has finished.

Although as our household all eat at different times due to work and school etc. A bit difficult to enforce. So we mostly end up with it on our knees watching tv.

 

Now I didn't say that it was the number 1 item on the weekly debate show, did I? We have far more important things to worry about, like not putting your washing out to dry (it's against the local by-law) and not driving 1km/hour over the speed limit in a school zone. Still, neanderthals who use their fork as a spoon still do my head in.

 

The only things kids do with knives these days is stab each other. Their generation is too cool for cutlery.