TFP is gay

it's official.

 

It's good to be back, good to be back.

I hope my wife, Alan, doesn't find out I'm a big gay ******.

Have I missed much?
I understand we won the association football match on Tuesday evening.

I don't give a **** really.
Football is ****.

 

RE: It's good to be back, good to be back.

nothings happened at all. Just been killing time.

Dirk got married.

 

And it turns out

his wife is a dirty whore. She works in my imginary shop.

 

Married?

The circus is in town I take it?

Someone suggested my avatar is Chris Jackson.
What does this mean?
I, for one, don't have a clue.

 

Ahhh.

Is this the bit where I get confused between the customer & the shopkeeper?

I hear we are 5th in some kind of table.
Well done, that's what I say.

I liked your 9 squares thread.

 

RE: Married?

Apparently she's nice. Jay is learning some of her jokes or something....in an attempt to be witty.

I think the poo material was hers to be honest.

 

Yes.

Jay likes other peoples poo material.
Usually a glass coffee table is involved.

Do you want to know where I've been then?

Me & Blantyre went out for a beer after the Tranmere game.
We had a few in the neet club - but were walking back to Brooklands for African dress bum fun - when he suddenly vanished half way across the motorway bridge.
I think he must have changed his mind, or summat.

 

RE: Yes.

I bet when you eat in restaurants you open your mouth fully and show everyone sat with you.

by restaurant, I mean mcdonalds and by everyone, I mean the mirror. obviously

 

RE: Yes.

Back for 11 minutes and you've got a Chris Jackson and a suicide gag in ...... impressive.
The umbrage meisters are shaking their fists at the screen.

 

Incorrect.

When eating I use my ample chin to store the next course.
Then I show everyone the food & stuff.

I've been to paradise,
But I've never been to the Isle of Wight.

Isle of Wight.
Isn't that what Elton John used to be called?

 

RE: Yes.

Are Kipper Jackson & Chris Jackson the same person?
Is Kipper his nickname cos he smells funny?

As they say - suicide is painless.
Unless you choose 'death by vegetable peeler'.

And Jay.

 

RE: Incorrect.

I saw Elton John at St Mary's Stadium this yaer. I should have asked him. Sadly I couldn't get anywhere near him as some dwarf was hanging off his legs and he ran off looking a bit scared.... and gay.

The dwarf was heartbroken... and gay

 

Caption comp

http://www.bloomingmarvellous.co.uk...D=Toddler_Tees&ProductID=24357&language=en-GB

 

Was the original question ...

... ''can I smother you to death, Mum''?

Dirk being spit roasted by Elton John & Dido (wearing a 14" black mamba strap on).

 

RE: Was the original question ...

I would allow Dido to bum **** me with a strap on. Fact.

 

RE: Was the original question ...

Is that the finale at this years Royal Variety performance?

 

RE: Was the original question ...

I've nothing else planned that night.

 

RE: Was the original question ...

get her booked then.

I'm guessing it'll be live or will she mime?

 

RE: Was the original question ...

Dunno, but I'd better get practicing my entry face.