That with Kozzie in Chronicle is here

2 - Bobby Hassell
&quot;If the sportswear firm Puma are reading this: please stop sending him gear, he looks dreadful in it! I thought underarmer clothing was tight, but this guy really is allergic to spending money.&quot;</p>

3 - Lewin Nyatanga
&quot;Living in Derby myself, I asked the locals what they thought of him. Ninety-six per cent had never heard of him and the remaining four per cent said the same.&quot;</p>

7 - Sam Togwell
&quot;The way Toggers goes on about Crystal Palace you would have thought he had played a thousand games for them. Sadly, on his recent return to play against them, I think he thought he was still there because he kept passing to them. His afternoon was rounded off when he got their 'man of the match' award.&quot;</p>

9 - Kayode Odejayi
&quot;A few recent articles in the newspapers have misquoted Kay saying Simon Davey was the best young manager in the country. What he meant to say is that he was the best manager he had slept with!&quot;</p>

10 - Brian Howard
&quot;The lads would like to thank Howie for single-handedly beating Liverpool and Chelsea, and if possible could we do an interview if you refuse one please!&quot;</p>

11 - Danie Nardiello
&quot;I'm getting a little bored of his never ending story about the chairman of QPR giving him a watch. Surely a contract would have been slightly better?&quot;</p>

13 - Istvan Ferenczi
&quot;A plea to tattoo shops across Europe: if this guy wanders in on his day off please refuse to do any art on him! The only spare place left for them to add anything more is his soles of his feet!&quot;</p>

16 - Stephen Foster
&quot;A man who's so entertaining he could very easily send a glass eye to sleep. I wouldn't say he's reached the Lewin Nyatanga or Bobby Hassell league yet, but he's getting very close.&quot;</p>

18 - Dennis Souza
&quot;Dennis has to be the only player I've worked with to get stretchered off with a blister. Talk about milking a tackle - this guy takes it to another level. At the end of the season you're going to be able to buy his pony tail off eBay because we're getting it on a night out, that's for sure.&quot;</p>

20 - Jamal Campbell-Ryce
&quot;Jamal recently had a birthday and asked me to buy him a couple of inches to his height to bring him to the same height of a Labrador. Come on Jamal, who do you think i am? Paul Mckenna?&quot;</p>

21 - Jon Macken
&quot;I think he should get a good reception today, what with buying you this ground with his transfer fee! Im confident you might be thinking the same as me - what with all his dough, surely a trip to a cosmetic surgeon is long overdue?&quot;</p>

23 - Marciano Van Homoet
&quot;His family don't know about the tattoo he has that covers the whole of his back. Well they do now.&quot;</p>

25 - Martin Devaney
&quot;He can nick a friend off you. Morgs used to text me in the morning, but now he's onto Davvers. Hand him back - he was my only friend in football! I also heard that him being under the thumbs at home is the understatement of the year!&quot;</p>

29 - Diego Leon
&quot;This guy calls me something in Spanish every morning, and although I Googled 'legend' it's not that, but when I find out I'll get my own back!&quot;</p>

31 - Luke Steele
&quot;You don't need me to tell you very much about him because he's done more interviews than Parkinson since he saved a couple against those guys who play in red. I've forgotten what they're called now......&quot;</p>

And to complete a brilliant set of responses, the man himself.............</p>

5 - Rob Kozluk
&quot;I came on loan to Preston earlier in my career, as you may remember! I spent more time on the M6 than the pitch, although I gave my team-mates a bit of banter! I've alose given a bit of banter to my team-mates here, but i would not swap any of them - they're a joy to work with. Well, maybe I'd swap Bob...&quot;</p>

 

thats class, i like Diego's especially

 

Awesome! Love the one about Nardi.

 

Sorry if theres some spelling mistakes

Just wrote out, so may be a few.</p>

Sorry if so </p>

 

he's worth the money we pay him

quality character

 

That was in the programme at PNE

He's a funny bloke!

 

kozluk one word a legend what a guy

 

Warnock said to my mate .. a Blades fan

if Kozluk never played a game, he would still have him on the squad for the positive morale he had on everyone at the club.

Quite a compliment

 

Yes. I heard that.
Warnock rated him very, very highly.

 

hes just what every club needs

thought he was great on soccer night that time taking pi$$ out of Ricketts and Howard etc

 

was same when we got to wembley, he was on there taking piss out of all thw squad "Brian Howard has been immense for us This season and he has been linked with a few big teams Like Dagenham and accrington stanley :

Legend this lad

 

Classic about Souza`s poneytail

 

I just hope Souza would see it the same way