This Friday's Chronicle back page...

Frustrated Reds manager, Andy Ritchie, was once again left bemoaning his bad luck as he was unable to sign an experienced defender on loan in time for this weekend's game at Oakwell. Said Ritchie, "I made three phone calls this week to all the clubs I could think of to see if they had got defenders they would allow out on loan but I was thwarted in all three of them. Yes, I'll tell you who I called. Monday was to Klamstoihedopica in Corfu, Tuesday's call was to Besjitatitas Sporting Klub in Uszbekistan, and Wednesday's was to Aeoionl, don't know where they are but they were the only seven letters I had left at the end of my game of Scrabble. I'm so annoyed I wish I could spit, but I'm not that kind of guy, it's just not me, so I let Rick Holden spit for me."
So the Reds go into the game tomorrow with only two regular "defenders" available, Barry Conlon, recalled from Rotherham United, and Nicky Wroe. Everybody else cried off either sick or incapable.