I’ve also missed out on the ballot, so have been thinking about the experience of watching the game on TV. I’ve got used to watching on iFollow this season, but of course it’ll have to be Sky this time. For anybody who might miss iFollow, here are a few tips for recreating the experience. For full effect, you’ll need the ability to pause live TV. Start watching the game at 8:25pm to simulate not being able to get things working for 10 minutes Prepare some stickers with names of South Wales businesses on them (e.g. a second hand car dealer in Swansea or a Chinese takeaway in Port Talbot). Continually add/remove these on your TV screen every few minutes throughout the match. Whenever discussing the game ensure you always refer to Swansea as “The Swans”. (This is more effective with teams like “The Chairboys” or “The Lillywhtes” but we’re not playing them!). When we look like we are mounting a dangerous attack, simply pause the television and then re-play the previous 30 seconds a couple of times. Then return to live TV having missed some key action. Turn the sound off for the last 10 minutes of the first half When the half-time adverts come on, turn your television up to four times its normal volume If the camera moves to the Swansea directors box and focuses on some people you don’t recognise, pause the TV for a couple of minutes. Then return to live TV having missed some key action. Ask your partner to announce the birthdays of some people you don’t know at a few points during the game (people they work with might be good candidates for this). If somebody is going to be 60 at some point, make sure they are referred to as “60 years young”. Anybody have any more to add?
Realise its buffered and you're a minute behind as everyone starts writing Deekay!! on the matchday thread.
Pause the game for a couple of minutes just before kick off and then randomly for a few second throughout the match to get the authentic buffereing experience and experience the shouts of Get In Dikeee from next door whilst we are defending a corner
You need another sticker with: SAY NO TO ILLEGAL STREAMS on it, even though you are watching the game legally.
As soon as the game finishes while Big Val and the players are about to celebrate our 4-0 victory, immediately change to Bid TV to ensure you don't miss any advertisements.
"A stunning first-leg victory for Barnsley - they take a four-goal lead to Wales on Saturday night. Wayne Goodison, your thoughts?" "Well, you couldn't have ask..." "FIFA 21. Dat's sic."
Have my step daughter sat on the next sofa speaking for the entire 90 minutes getting louder and louder everytime you ask her to be quiet
I’ve invited Snoop Dog for a takeaway. AND he says he’s bringing his motorbike. J, U, S, T..... Think I’ll order from Uber Eats just so he doesn’t sing!!!
.... and watch 572561 appear at random times in different parts of the screen like some weird space invaders game
Really looking forward to unbiased commentary from the likes of Lee Tremblebum and other sundry Welsh sympathisers. “Well boyo what did these northerners expect? They should be GRATEFUL for the chance to share a pitch with us”
Maybe the Sky commentators will wish a happy retirement to Brian from Monk Bretton or happy 13th to Oliver from Cundy Cross. In fairness, this has been frowned upon before, on iFollow commentary, but, personally, I like it. They’re our commentators for our club, from our town. Nowt up with the odd personal touch in my eyes.
After the games finished just leave the camera rolling and the mic open and let commentators bugger off with some random guy phoning his mate in the background that you can hear one side of the conversation. Great fun as you can make up what the guy in the other end is saying.