A Demon approaches the Devil and says. "Dark lord, Two men from SHEFFIELD have been sent here. What should be done with them?" The Devil says. Dee Dahs Their kind and are normally very friendly, helpful and honest, so we do not see many such men in my dark domain. Hang them in a cage over the lake of fire for now and I shall check on them later." But when the Devil flew up to the cage to check on the Dee Dahs he found them happily lounging around with their shirts off. "What is the meaning of this?" The Devil cried. "You're supposed to be in torment!" The men looked surprised. "Nah." They said. "It's pure quality tops off weather here man. It's not drab and depressing like Sheffield you know. Fuming, the Devil flew to the great thermostat of Hell and cranked it all the way to the top. And the next day, the temperature was so high that even the Demons were sweating, the stones of hell were melting and the flames from the lake of fire were leaping higher than ever before. So the Devil was surprised when he visited the Dee Dahs and found that they had somehow procured plastic lawn furniture and a couple of bottles of Buckfast tonic wine. Raising a glass to the Devil, one of the men said. "Hey big man, If I'd known it was so lovely an warm down here, I'd've done a whole lot more sinning! Weather's always miserable in Sheffield. Always freezin' ma nuts off "I see." The Devil replied, smiling through clenched teeth. "Your dismal town has given you a great love of heat. The hotter it is, the happier you are. Well, we'll see about that." So he flew to the great thermostat of Hell once more, but this time, he turned it all the way down. The next day, the lake of fire was frozen solid for the first time, sinners were frozen in blocks of ice and Demons huddled in corners for warmth, their teeth chattering. But when the Devil visited the Dee Dahs, he found them jumping for joy, tearfully cheering. "Sheffield Wednesday Forever. The Devil's jaw dropped. "What? Why? How? I burn you and you are happy! I freeze you and you celebrate! What is wrong with you?" One of Dee Dahs turned back and said...... "Is it not fuckin' obvious Big Man? Hell's frozen over this means Wednesday are in the Premier League. Sent from Mail for Windows 10
