I reached into the back seat for my blue wool cap and my gloves. I kept them there for those mornings when it was nippy on the golf course. I slipped into them. "What the **** are you doing, man?" Charlie said. "You look like a burglar." "Good." I said. I reached under the seat for my knife." I could hear Charlie just behind me, saying something, urging me to get the **** out of there, and at one point he even reached for me and tried to drag me away, but I shook him off, hard, and moved toward Goldman. "Okay, ************!" I said. "Show me how tough you are!" Then something went horribly wrong, and I know what happened, but I can't tell you exactly how. The whole front of me was covered in blood. Nicole. Jesus. I looked down and saw her on the ground in front of me, curled up in a fetal position at the base of the stairs, not moving. Goldman was only a few feet away, slumped against the bars of the fence. He wasn't moving either. Both he and Nicole were lying in giant pools of blood. I had never seen so much blood in my life. I again looked down at myself, at my blood-soaked clothes, and noticed the knife in my hand. The knife was covered in blood, as were my hand and wrist and half of my right forearm.