Discussion in 'Bulletin Board' started by Connor, Feb 25, 2018.
It was her first day solo on the beat after graduating from the police academy... And being the only wpc at her new placement and the weather being very warm.. she felt justified that she had ignored the advice of wearing uniform trousers and chosen the skirt option.. She felt free from any restrictions... She was so wrapped up in her thoughts she wasn't aware of the trouble that was to bestow her shortly as the side door on the white van parked in front off her slowly opened... She drew level and two sinister males dressed in black clothes and wearing balaclavas pounced and wrestled her into the van.. She gave as good as she got..
During the struggle her knicker elastic snapped and her pants cascaded to the pavement.. Stepping out of them she delivered a powerful kick into the groin of one of her would be abductors but to no avail
They were too powerfull and they soon over come her valoured attempts to fight them off...
A member of the public witnessing the said scene but unable to intervene due to her mobility problem contacted the police...
Within minutes the police were swarming in to the crime scence missing the van by hours..
They cordoned off the area noting the police regulation knickers lying in the gutter with their now broken elastic on display...
The forensic crime scene investigators studied the said pants and called in the dog handler and his dog
Who promptly unleashed his German shepherd and ordered the dog to
The dog took several large sniffs and bolted down the street in the direction that the white van had taken followered closely by its handler and several other officers..
The dog on passing the police station suddenly turned bounded up the steps charged though its doors and bit off 3 of the duty Sargents fingers...
Just got a job as senior director at Old MacDonald's Farm.
I'm the CIEIO.
Sez to r lass last neight wen we got in, 4 ya Silver wedding anniversary, pick up that dart, throw it at that world wall chart, where it lands that the destination.
Cant foookin believe it 2 weeks by the foookin skirting boards.
Just bin darn to mates, r sez, r lass aint getting pregnant,
Silly bastard sez as she got COIL IN.
R sez got foookin coil in, the lazy foooka aint dun foookin POTS, either.
Next next door neighbours mother in law is to come and stay for a few days next week .
Saw him with the dog today and said r u going for a walk ?
No he said I’m taking the dog to the vets to hav it’s tail amputated .
What for I said is it troubling him ?
No he replied I just don’t want any sign of welcome shen she comes that’ll make her stay any longer than she has to .
Made me titter did that
And which point made you titter?
The rather erect straw.
I was on holiday in Egypt last week and saw a man standing in the river. He claimed he was not getting wet...
He was definitely in denial.....
To the Person who stole my glasses. I will find you. I have contacts...
FOOTBALLS BEST KEPT SECRET
Did tha know 1 in 10 Sheff Wed fans,
talk as much, Boll ocks, abart football as the other 9
Just bin caught avin sex by Daughter, embarrassing,
R sez its ok we were just making you a baby brother,
She sez why dunt ya do it doggy style an r can av a puppy instead.
I was at a restaurant and said to the waitress ”Excuse me, can I ask you something about the menu please?” She kicked me out and said “The men I please are none of your business!”
My boss was supposed to deliver a training course on Innuendo's in the workplace after many staff members complained about me. Unfortunately she wasn't well and couldn't attend, so I had to fill her slot instead!
Religion in a nutshell.
Apologies if you’re religious, no, wait...
THE BARNSLEY FC
BBS FANS FORUM
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