O/T Single again now.

Good luck and get yourself to Wembley

 

Bbs could all chip in and take SD to wembley

 

Already bought my coach ticket and my Dad's lending me 50 quid to book my match ticket this afternoon. Just got to get to Barnsley for 8am Monday morning and I've cracked it.

 

Glad you're coming SD.
Wouldn't mind meeting you in Ponte for a pint one day mate. I've been through what you're going through now and believe me things will get much better. Keep your chin up pal.
COYR

 

Cheers mate.

 

all the best mate. I went through it 3 years ago and eventually got myself sorted. keep talking..lifes ace now

 

Good lad!

 

If you're struggling for help and need someone to vent to (other than on here), I would absolutely recommend seeing if there's an Andy's Man Club near you. 7 - 9pm on Monday evenings. People will listen, help and share.

 

It's getting easier. Just got to get into a routine now. Strimming the garden tonight.

 

Bottom line is you have to look after yourself. Youre the priority. You have a little kiddy who'll need her dad. When things settle down emotionally and financially you'll be able to crack on. Best wishes.

 

Cheers George will need his Dad but I've got to sort myself out first. I haven't even done the walk of shame to collect my things yet. Hopefully Laura will be true to her word and take him out while im collecting it.

She's asked me for 100 quid today as a down payment to take George out but I'm not daft. I've just told her she's not having a penny. She won't explain to me where she's found childcare for George and how she's paying the rent.

Obviously she has set some wheels in motion and it's a guilt trip.

 

Not easy and emotions will be all over the place. Also not easy to stay calm and logical but that's the thing to do. Get things in writing/email/text if you can and don't assume anything on a 'word' until legal parameters are set up at the very least. Keep calm, stay safe, enjoy the match on Monday and you'll be ok long term so dont overly despair just cos things are difficult at moment. Tunnels always have light at the end

 

Good advice i thought my world had ended after 37 years but little did i know it was just beginning and it takes time but you'll get there believe me. All the best and heed this good advice/ help.

 

Got my match ticket now.

 

All this will pass, when times are bad hang in, they will get better, when things are amazing, remember there might be tough times ahead so prepare.

 

Sounds like she’s up to something with someone to me,I believe in karma.chin up.

 

Hi,

I've been a member on here for 10 years + but never posted or written anything. I just use it to get updates on BFC. I couldn't ignore your post though as I've recently been going through a breakup. Obviously I don't know you, I don't know your exact situation, but I know what's it's like to go through a breakup. I was put on antidepressant after it, but there are a few things I know that helped get me through it and maybe they could help you too:

1, accept it hurts.

The change is painfully unbearable and you feel so guilty for not making it work. Eventually you try convincing yourself you're ok and everything's fine, when in reality you're not. Embrace that pain, be honest with yourself as to how painful it is, do not feel guilty or ashamed for it being painful, accept it and let yourself work through it at your own speed.

2, don't turn to the drink,

While it makes you feel all good, you feel like rubbish on the come down. Plus it could make you do or say something you regret which could make your situation a whole lot worse.

3, do not procrastinate,

Keep busy, focus on work, walk the dog, clean your place, read a book, go to the gym, whatever you enjoy doing

4, stay civil,

No matter what rubbish is being spewed at you, no matter how much they are claiming you're the one to blame for this, remain dignified. It's easy to fall in to this trap of guilt, but most of us are brought up to know the difference between right and wrong, and if you know you have done the right thing then that's what matters, remain dignified for your child. You be the role model they need.

5, accept the change, accept it's over,

Once you accept it is over (takes time) you will be ready to get on with your life, and let your ex get on with theirs. You wouldn't want anyone who doesn't want to be with you stay with you, it would just be both of you being truly unhappy for a long time. No move on and let them too. There are 3.7 billion other women out there. No need to focus on one that doesn't want you.

6. Who knows what's good or bad,

My aunty once won 300 quid in her local club, then got mugged on her way home.....it was great that she won the 300 but it caused her to have one of the worst experiences of her life....my point being is that whatever happens we can not say whether it's good or bad because we can't see in to the future. It may seem like a terrible experience right now, but you do not know what is around the corner. Just wait, stay patient and things will work out.

6, keep a level head,

Develop a stoic attitude when dealing with your ex, especially when it comes to child arrangements. Don't let them see they can affect your emotions, with this in mind I'd suggest buying some books on stoicism and giving them a read (seriously)

I'm sorry for the long one, sorry if it all sounds like rubbish advice, but I just thought I'd share some things I've come to realise through my own situation. You will find your way to deal with it and maybe in a few years time it will just be a blip of a memory. Keep going and stay blessed my friend

 

Thank you.

 

I’ve never been in this situation (purely because I haven’t had many girlfriends ) but this sounds like brilliant advice

 

Trust me this is NOT rubbish advice ,well put.