Robin Williams commits suicide

Very sad news indeed.
one of my favourite "old school" comedy actors.

Pure talent, but worked dam hard to get where he did.

RIP Robin Williams

 

RIP Robin Williams. Fantastic man and a genius entertainer.

 

I've spent my entire life dealing with depression, right from being a child. In some ways it's had a positive effect on my life. I try not to let trivial things alter my mood. I know that genuine despair can be just around the corner, triggered by nothing at all, so I do my best to try to take the positives out of a situation rather than dwell on the negatives, which can send me spiralling down in to what feels like oblivion. I don't habitually slag off my football team and endlessly search for the negatives, but look for the good that can be taken from a situation in order to help me feel happier. And there are positives, even in a 1-0 home defeat by Crawley.

Happiness is massively underrated. Because I find happiness so elusive, because I'm constantly striving for it but rarely achieving it, it genuinely saddens me that so many people seem to go out of their way to be unhappy themselves or make others unhappy. If they're not moaning and griping about their football team or middle lane drivers on the motorway, they're putting someone else down or having a go. I don't want anyone else to feel how I feel. I suffer from depression, but I'm not a miserable lovely person, I doubt you'd know I suffer from a mental illness without me telling you (well, you might think I'm nutty, but not depressed). Because I struggle for happiness myself, I try to make those those around me happy. I try not to moan and whine, I try not to slag off others, it just brings people down, I try to make people laugh and feel good about themselves. I don't always achieve that, I'm an arsehole like everyone else and I have plenty of personality defects that are nothing to do with my depression, but my basic outlook is to try to bring happiness not unhappiness.

That's the good it's done me. In reality it's ruined my life. I'm well qualified and quite capable but I find it almost impossible to hold down even the most basic employment. Depression runs hand in hand with anxiety, mental problems lead to physical symptoms. You can't pack boxes when you're shaking like an aspen leaf and you haven't slept a wink in over a week. One afternoon I was so ****** up my eyes started bleeding. When I'm OK nothing stresses me out. I worked for a couple of years in live television. I'd find air traffic control a doddle. I'm so laid back I'm horizontal. When the depression hits, just going to the shop is a herculean task that feels like I'm being asked to go over the top.

I always view suicide as like a cliff with a green meadow stretching away from it. Sometimes you're far away from the edge, playing in the meadow, sometimes you're gripping on to the cliff face with your finger nails. Stuff in your life takes you away from the edge, a job, financial security, hobbies, a partner, friends and family. As the depression hits you start losing those and start slipping towards the edge. The likes of Robin Williams and Gary Speed looked to be miles away from the cliff, somewhere off in the distance while you balance precariously on the edge. They're successful and rich and have all those things that keep a person away from the edge. When they go over you start to feel very vulnerable. Today is another difficult day.

This is not a cry for help, I'm not in danger, it's just an attempt to express how it feels when a fellow sufferer chooses to go over and how you, selfishly, relate that to your own life. It's particularly difficult when it's someone you look up to and respect and have always thought that person was dealing with it all so much better than you are.

 

Pull yourself together man.

 

And go for a good walk. That'll sort you out.

Actually, that's one of the few things I've found that helps. That and ten pints of Stella, but as Robin Williams would have testified, it sort of brings on its own problems.

 

Once again Jay, thank you for expressing how I feel better then I could ever do it myself.

This especially:

I know people might think I'm a 'fragile fcuker' or that I can't take a joke at someone else's expense (I can take one at my own very easily) but you just never know how unhappy people are and what impact that one seemingly harmless comment might have.

 

One of the most moving posts I have ever read.

 

I think that is one of the reasons I don't really drink - I don't ever want to find out that it makes me feel better because that would be too scary. I will only ever drink when I am completely happy. What helps me is making a little 'tent'. I don't know why but everything feels better then, sort of like 'if I can't see out nothing out there can see me'.

 

That's as moving and emotional a post as I've read on any version of the BBS. Well done, old friend. My respect for you has gone up even further and I wouldn't have thought that to be possible.
Just get to your seat quicker next match!

 

The big trouble with drink is that although it can make you feel better that day (it doesn't for some people, it makes them worse) it almost always makes you feel worse the day after. The solution to that? Another drink. Many people with mental illness problems self medicate, whether that's with alcohol or cocaine or marijuana or heroin or whatever their drug of choice. It can work too, spectacularly, which makes it all the more dangerous. Mental health problems and addiction often go hand in hand.

 

Nanu Nanu.

Mork calling Orsen, Mork calling Orsen whats gunna win the 2-30 at Lingfield.

RIP Robin.

 

Mind, reading this board should at least show you that there's always somebody worse off than yourself.

'But Robin Williams had fame and money' - tap room psychiatrists everywhere espouse.

 

Drinking and drugs pretty obviously aren't going to help anyone with mental health problems.

I find exercising to be very good for mental health. It gives you a sense of achievement and a target (e.g., to run a certain distance, or whatever you choose to do) raises your self-esteem and releases natural chemicals in the body which genuinely make you feel a bit better. It can also become an addiction but a fairly positive one.

 

Those are the 2 things I rely on to deal with the "black dog".

Very good post Jay.

Depression is an illness & unless you have suffered you can't really begin to understand it. On the plus side most of the creative & funny
people of all time have the same affliction.
RW was one of those people & will be sadly missed.

 

****ing gutted. Special human being. Comedy legend. Incredible actor that just moved people with the depth of his emotional sincerity. Goodwill Hunting. What Dreams May Come. Good Morning Vietnam. His screen presence could hold you in the palm of his hand. His comic personality - sometimes driven by an irresistable narcotic energy, sometimes just by a surreal genius, could make you hurt with the laughter. I was always so convinced by Robin Williams that despite his demons, i always felt that what you saw is what he was. In good times and bad. Depression can be a terminal illness and we've been robbed of a very special human being. We should have a minutes silence or something.

 

Same as Jay I've had to deal with depression for most of my life. I'm in a fairly good place at the moment but suicidal thoughts have entered my head on many occasions. Visits from crisis teams and trips to councillors and increased medication helped me get through it - just.
RIP Robin -Fisher King was my favourite film of his - doesn't often get a mention but we'll worth a watch

 

I have never met you Jay but after reading that post its obvious you are one hell of a special human being.
Total respect for your outlook and positive actions in dealing with this dreadful illness.
Its easy to feel negativity with Depression but a damn sight harder to overcome this not allowing whats happening in your head to affect people you love and cherish.
Football is a mere shadow in the background when trying to deal with life's complexities. I suppose it could be described as a pleasant entertaining distraction away from the hum drum of trying to lead what we call living a normal life. Of course that is when we are Winning! Lol
Keep up the fight and remember you are not alone and will always have the love and respect of your family and friends