What message would you like to leave on your headstone when you are Dead!!

Shot by a jealous husband aged 92

 

I can see t'Ponty from ere!

i can . Ive been and had a look.Cant see the bloody pitch though.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Edwin young of face
Always first in a milk race
Tofu did him in the end
Now Carole's back is on the mend.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies TM in a stripy shirt,
Suffocated by the flaps of their Gert,
A requiem, or maybe a sonnet?
That's an end to faecal vomit.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies ugly TFP
Drop your kecks and have a wee

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here rests Jay
But it's not really fair
We couldn't close the lid
Cos of his hair.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Jay, dressed in his Parka,
His 'olive' skin is looking darker,
Shiny shirt & 80's loafers,
Buried with his leather sofa.

 

It's getting colder again

so the Parka will soon be getting a airing.

Can't wait.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Masterstroke in here is buried
Sheep and pigs are what he worried
The right royal piss is what he took
Pity about his negative outlook.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Hartog, **** in hand
Filtiest Barsteward in the land
Had a manky, warty bone
Dished it out in Lovingstones.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Gord, slightly leaner
Nose still like, neat ribena

 

RE: It's getting colder again

Here lies Jay - the homo boffin,
Too fat to fit in a coffin,
So he's buried in a barge,
These funerals don't come free of charge

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Paolo
next to Gran
Kids spending legacy
In Matalan

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Noodles on his back,
Seems he finally got the sack,
Someone found him - he was hung,
By the neck? No, by his tongue.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies EI - died from a rash
Buried with his piles of cash
Always charged - dint work for nothing
PC in every room of his coffin

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Nardy
Double Coffin
Very handy
For double boffin

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Sheff from suicide,
No he's alive - it seems he lied.

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Becky
Legs akimbo
roasted like
some tabloid bimbo

 

RE: Here lies Jay ... Stiff for the first time in years.

Here lies Babsa in his dress,
Died of major anal stress,
Dry loved by a team of ten,
Tried to escape on MSN.

 

Or ...

Here lies Beckster, the ginger lass,
Took it in M & P & A,
Recently she barely posted,
Much too busy being roasted.